Through The Years We All Will Be Together

Yesterday I woke up with a raging headache. I cannot tell you how much of an inconvenience it was. Normally I would have done what I did first off, and that was call Sakura to see if he could come and sit with me, because I hate being alone when I am throwing up and so dizzy I am terrified I might pass out at any given moment. Normally, I would have done that and rested with him, knowing I was safe, until the headache passed. Normally.

But yesterday was my family Christmas party. That may not seem like a huge deal, but I had decided to go for the first time since Kitten and I got together. We went that first Christmas and then never again. It wasn't that I don't like Christmas with my family. I mean, okay, its always a little...different, with my family- but I always went before now. And Kitten wasn't the reason I wasn't going. It was personal, and I felt like it would be better for me not to be there. This year is different. Circumstances in my life have changes and made it to where I wanted to go, at least in some small measure. I'm on much better terms with my family than I was before, and there are a lot of other things going on in my families lives that make me want to be there.

I'm unsure if I've mentioned it here already, but last week my grandmother was in the hospital. They thought she was having a heart attack. She wasn't, thank god, and she was up and moving around much faster than I would have expected. This, however, put me in the mind of two things yesterday morning. The first was that I need to appreciate every moment I have with my family, because I am not guaranteed anything. The other was that if my grandmother had been in the hospital and was still going to family Christmas, then by god,- so was I.

So I spent a few hours struggling with nausea and my pain, patiently laying on the couch with Sakura, letting him feed me spoonfuls of anti-nausea liquid and sipping at tepid water. He helped me to struggle into a skirt and a long sleeved shirt and we headed off to the party. When we got there my family had already arrived, for the most part. My mom was at the store picking up last minute provisions and my brother came in shortly behind me. It was...overwhelming. At first because I always forget how huge my family is. I mean, we rent a community room because there is no house big enough to hold all of us. There were about 40 there, and I know we were missing a few people. The other thing was...well, my brother.

It was the first time I had seen him since the winter Kitten and I got together. Three years. He's changed. A lot. Appearance wise, he's taller if that's possible, or I forgot how tall he really is. He also wears much nicer clothing than he used to. His extremely long hair is gone (really long, like longer than mine) and he doesn't wear a beard anymore. And he was sober. Sober and clean. I haven't seen him that way since the both of us were in high school. Like a girl, I cried. It was embarrassing. He looked at me, hugged me, and then asked me why I was crying. I told him I wasn't, and he laughed at me and hugged me again. Then he told me he loved me. For the first time in a very long time, I believed him.

Of course, the happy reunion was cut short by me dashing down the hall. First, I needed to throw up. Too much emotion plus a migraine equals sickness. Then I wanted a moment to pull myself together. No such luck. My cousins and my grandmother and Sakura were all hot on my heels. Ah, the joy of family. Once I convinced them that yes, I was fine, they let me have a moment.

I spent most of the first hour sitting along the wall watching my family eat. Honestly, I wasn't very hungry because I was still feeling a little woozy, so I was happy just watching. Sakura and I chatted. I got a huge kick out of him telling me he was surprised that my family was so southern. Like, bless your heart, deep-south southern. Its true. I had never really thought about it before. But seeing my family, all of whom came by to encourage me to eat (because obviously Sakura wasn't going to eat if I didn't and we can't have a guest unfed!) bustling around the room and spending time together, it became very apparent that yes, my family might as well be somewhere in Georgia for how southern we are. And it was funny, too, to watch them try and get me to eat because they were worried about poor Sakura wasting away. It made me giggle, too, because I don't look too much like the rest of my family and my personality is very different from theirs. Sakura says he assumed my family would be more like a group of people from the eastern seaboard. That made me smile.

I was glad to see my cousins, whom I never see enough of. Lovey and her little sister Spurs were up from Oklahoma. I love seeing them. I got a kick out of Spurs, because she is such a little cowgirl, and I would never have guessed her for one when she was little. Now she's all grown up and sometimes I get a little misty eyes thinking of the two of them when they weren't so big. Now instead of talking about our favorite Disney movies or where we want to go on spring break we're talking about our significant others and our first experiences at strip clubs. Ah, growing up. I'm going to do my best to have them up to see me sometime this spring. I'm definitely going to visit them. I love Oklahoma. Plus any chance I get to see them is a holiday.

My younger cousins were there too, and by younger I mean, you know, in high school. (when did I get so old???) It was kind of funny to see them sitting at the table playing some sort of racing game on their smart phones. I remember when I was a kid we would sneak into the back room and play Nintendo when no one was watching. It brought back memories. All of my older relatives don't seem so old now. In fact, I was remarking it to Sakura, some of them are closer to me in age than my cousins. Its strange.

I was really happy when Kitten and Oscelot got there. They got off of work early so they could make it. I was able to introduce them to my whole family for the first time. I was thrilled. Everyone was so kind to them, and so loving. My great-aunt pulled me aside to tell me how wonderful she thought they were, and how she was glad to see I had found people who really, truly loved me. She said I had picked two women with very tender hearts and she was proud of me. It made me want to run out of the room crying again. I got a kick out of Oscelot telling me how huge my brother was. She's super short, so he looks like a giant next to her. It was hilarious. We got to take some pictures with the family, and that was nice. I can't wait for everyone to upload all of their pics so I can save them on my computer. I need a family album.

Anyway, it was a really nice time. I managed to sit down and eat some potatoes. My mom called me this morning and was horrified that's all I had eaten. She's bringing me over leftovers today I think. I got to watch my family interact with my chosen family. It was really, really nice. I feel better about this holiday than I have about any holiday I've had with my family since I was a child.

I hope that all of you are able to find something special this holiday.

AGxx

PS- I'm adding some photos below, because I can. Ignore the fact that I look awful- I was sick, after all.

Here's me and Kitten and Oscelot. Nothing like a smiling family to make the holidays brighter, right? In the background you'll notice my two gargantuan cousins messing around.

Here's me and my mom and Punk. First picture like this in years. I'd like to add that last night my mom texted me to tell me thank you for coming. She said having me, Punk, the girls and Sakura there made it feel like Christmas for her, because she was with her family. 






This is my three female cousins. From left to right: Spurs, Colorgirl and Lovey. They are just the darn cutest things. I'd like to mention, Lovey and Spurs are my height. Colorgirl is just super tall. Super, super tall.

Faithful Friends Who Are Dear To Us Gather Near To Us Once More

Its December and time to look back on the year and see how I've done and what's happened to me. I'll confess, I hadn't even thought about it until I signed on to Facebook this morning and it was offering me the album of my Top 20 Moments of 2012. Most of them weren't really top moments. So I thought I would tote up all the things that happened to me and go through them. It was an interesting job down recent memory lane.

In January I started working on a lesbian romance novel. It ended up crashing and burning later, but it was a good start to me writing more than I had before. It was also a decent idea, which I will probably use some time in the near future. For the first time in years I got seriously ill with some sort of virus, an indicator that my body has finally stopped holding up on its contract to not get sick and just punish me with migraines. Kitten and I had our birthdays and nothing too epic happened when I turned a year older. I finally blocked my ex BBD on Facebook because he started up with his stalker like tirades again. I also threatened him with an Ex Parte, he hasn't shown his face since.

In February I saw the Memphis ballet, and was moved to tears. Kitten began contemplating the out of town internship over the summer, which she thankfully ended up not taking. We had Thanksgiving in February with our friends, the first in a long line of weird themed dinner parties over the year. I discovered the Warriors series by Erin Hunter and found out there's nothing like a book about feral cats to make you cry.

In March I started gardening for the season, most notably planting more roses and plotting out a garden for veggies and herbs in the back. I reorganized the books in my library, sort of. We went to Kansas City, MO to see Katie Herzig live and despite the fact that I had a headache, had a great time. I actually met her after the show and we got pics. Sakura and I began contemplating a formal coven structure as a result of friction within the coven. Kitten was hired to work temp at Casa Bueno and Oscelot was rehired.  Oscelot celebrated her birthday.

In April I had a period so bad I was hospitalized. Turns out I had a torn cyst. Shorty had her 21st and we had a great time out with her. Not much else happened.

In May I attended my first family gathering in years because my cousin Mustang had graduated high school. I began to feel really old about it. Beltane we washed in the may dew and had a good time. The coven began changes that would eventually become a more formal structure. Ties of friendship were renewed among some of my closer friends. I learned I am a planning sort of person. I also had the first of two fights this year that resulted in me losing a friend and me discovering that I can take the higher ground when I want to. Even if I don't want to.

In June I had my wisdom teeth out. I discovered the Lizzie Bennet Diaries on YouTube and became obsessed. We got a new car, and by new I mean a 1982 Honda we call Vannessa. We wrote the coven bylaws, I met Felix, started seeing Auras on purpose and not accident. I memorized the Charge of the Goddess. I also met Sakura's mom after we sort-of formalized that agreement we'd made to move to the Rose City together soon. It became unbearably hot. We started conserving water for the gardens.

July saw us all over town. Flyguy and I had a fun time trashing a dress. We went to see James Taylor in concert and it was awesome. We went with Kitten's mom to Tulsa for a couple of days to explore art museums and learn about George Washington. I saw his teeth. No, they weren't made of wood. I had the second of my fights that lost me a friend. This particular one really hurt, but then, that sort of thing does. It got even more hot than it had been. Temps in the 100+ all the time.

August I bought a bicycle but didn't ride it much because of the heat. We threw a huge pirate themed party for Spice's birthday and had Christmas in August as well. I really, truly went to town on the bookshelves but only made it to M because I ran out of shelf space. It finally rained, finally. I went to the fair with my friends and had a blast. I hadn't been in a few years, and it was a wonderful time. I discovered we had skunk kittens hiding under our shed and that they were making friends with the cats on our porch. I put down Starkit, bless his soul, after he got hit by a car. I cried over him. He was adorable.

In September I quit my job and became a housewife. Best decision I ever made. I started working on my first romance piece for publication. I started working on costumes for our trip to the KC Renaissance Fair. I bonded with a couple of my cousins over hard times. I realized not all the crap I've been through has been for naught.

In October we went to the Ren Fair and had a great time. I came up with a brilliant novel idea. I made my first made from scratch cake and discovered I can bake so long as its complicated. We had a wonderful Samhain ritual at Kitten's moms and I felt really connected to my family. I discovered, at the same time, that I am allergic to pumpkins. I began quilting.

Last month I lost myself in the elections and in NaNoWriMo. I bonded with my wonderful beta reader KittyMammas and realized I am lucky to have access to so  many wonderful writers and a great community. I spent my first election night up all night since I turned 18 and discovered I have an awesome family who's willing to drag the couch into the library and watch live election streaming with me until 1am. I have spent a lot of time bonding with Kitten's mom, which has been great. I also spent Thanksgiving with my mom and grandma for the first time in years.

That brings us to now. Last week I got back on the submissions train and am beginning new work as a writer. I also went to see White Christmas on the big screen with friends and felt completely unashamed at my tears for the first time ever. It was awesome. Who knows how the rest of this month will turn out.

I'll say this- it has been both an awesome and really difficult year. I want to thank all the people who have supported me through all of this crazy. You've helped me grow in ways you'll never imagine. A special thanks to Sakura, Aravis, Swiss, Shorty and Felix for making this year unforgettable and bearable. You are wonderful people.

Take a Chance on Me

Hi everyone.

I wanted to give you a quick update about my life and the blog. No- I'm not going anywhere, you won't get off the hook that easily.

First, you'll notice I updated my blogroll. I've added some sites that I frequent and deleted some that I don't go to very often or that have become inactive. There's a lot there for writers if you're looking for some good industry information. I have to admit, this is as much for me as for you. I'm here often enough its nice to be able to click my own links to navigate myself around the web. I might point out in particular Big Pink Crayon, which is an awesome charity fundraising blog. I love what she's doing and I think its wonderful. Go donate if you have some spare change.

Also, I've started a new blog. This one is called Beguiled by Books and is a place where I'm going to review what I've been reading. A lot of it will be romance novels, which I know isn't entirely everyone's speed, but I've really gotten to where I read them most of the time. I love the genre and I think that there's a lot more that goes into it than a lot of people realize. That said, if you like romance, or books, you should come by and check it out.

I submitted my latest work to a publisher this week. I will hopefully be hearing back from them in the next couple of months. Unlike my last go, I feel like I have a really good shot at this one. I think its a well written book and it fits well with the publisher's style. We're going to see. This is the first time I've submitted to a publisher in response to a call for books rather than an agent. I'm excited and nervous all at the same time. This is a huge step for me. I'll soon be starting the second book in the series and the research is going to keep me really, really busy. Fortunately, I love research. I just wonder where I'm going to put it all, because the piles next to my desk are already looking pretty scary.

In personal news, I've had a terrifying week with regards to one of my friends. My dear friend Sakura had some really scary nosebleeds. After he took three consecutive trips to the ER, he finally hit paydirt on trip four and they figured out what was wrong with him. He had a posterior nose bleed and they had to cauterize one of the arteries in his nose. I spent a lot of this week worrying about him. He's so special to me, and I hate seeing him in pain. It was a relief when they finally got him taken care of.

In good news, my dear friend Bobcat got her tests back and she is now cancer free. I am so happy about this I could cry. She's such a wonderful, brave, amazing soul and I have felt for her through all of this. It was the highlight of my week to hear the good news and know that she is well.

I'm pretty sure that's all the interesting stuff so far. I hope you're having an exciting start to your week too.

AGxx

I Went Out Looking for the Answers

November is never a very kind month is it?

I've been so busy the last four weeks i can hardly think strait. Outside of the Thanksgiving holiday there's been no end to the crazy. Kitten missed it with my family because she had a nasty bout of the flu. That same week I pulled my back picking up trash in my bathroom and couldn't hardly walk. I was zombie shambling most of the last two weeks. I can sit up now, and walk better, but I'll be damned if it doesn't still hurt. Yule is just around the corner and I have done next to no planning for it. I did get some greenery up in my house and made a couple of wreaths, but that's been the extent of my holiday cheer so far.

I've spent most of this month working on my book. I'm sending it off to a publisher in a couple of weeks, and I have really high hopes for this one. I think I've got a really good chance at publishing now. I'm working diligently. I think I've spent more time at my computer this month than I have in the last year, and that's really saying something. On the up side, getting work done has inspired me and I have at least six more book ideas ready to roll. It looks like I'll be doing a lot of writing in the foreseeable future.

I've also spent a lot of time with Kitten's mom. She's been a really great companion these last two months. Its nice to have such a good relationship with her, especially since I was so intimidated by her when we first met. I feel better about myself when I'm around her now. I feel really lucky that she treats me with respect. Turns out we have a lot of common interests, too. So there's never any lack of something to talk about.

I've been especially happy because she has taken the time to learn about my religion and has asked a lot of really good questions. She knows the members of my coven and she looks at them as part of our family. Its really nice. I feel a lot more grounded than I have in the past and that's such a nice thing.

I haven't got a lot to say today, so I'm going to run off and keep working on the book. With any luck I'll be picked up by this fantastic publisher and I'll be well on my way to career as a writer. I hope everything is as exciting and interesting for all of you.

AGxx

You've Been So Kind and Generous

Right, so all of these people are on facebook writing these posts this month about how they are thankful for something each day. Now, I don't normally have a problem with this. I think its good that we're thankful. It does irritate me that they only do it for the month of November, because of Thanksgiving. I'm not saying what they're doing is bad. More that I wish people could say something they are thankful for every day, not just every day in a month. Its something that changes your outlook on life, I think, when you take stock of all the things you've been blessed with.

That said, I figure its about time I did another one of those posts where I talk about all the things I am thankful for, because I am a very lucky woman. I thought I would do thirty, since that's what everyone else seems to be doing, but I thought I would get it all out here at once, rather than updating facebook every day. Seems more efficient, and while I might not seem the type, I am all about efficiency.

1. I am thankful that I am alive. I have made a lot of really stupid decisions in my life which could have changed that, and I am thankful that I survived my own stupidity. I am also thankful that thus far in my life, I have survived all the illnesses I have had. I've not got great health, but I have some health, and a lot of days, that's something to be thankful for.

2. I am thankful for Kitten. There's not been a doubt in my mind since the day four years ago that I ran back into her that I am a lucky woman. She is a very supportive partner. She's very loving and she has a lot of heart. I have never met someone so courageous or committed to doing the right thing. She's incredibly strong and she has taught me to be a stronger and better person.

3. I am thankful for Oscelot. I really think sometimes I don't tell her enough how much she has taught me about myself. Through her I have been able to see how I have grown as a person, and also how much more work I have to do. I am also very lucky to have her as my own personal cheerleader. I've never had a person in my life who was so relentlessly  committed to my success, even when I was feeling like a failure. That's a huge gift.


4. I am thankful for Sakura. He has been the best and truest friend I could have asked for. In the last two years he and I have become so close. I've been very lucky to have him there, helping me along, teaching me. Without his support I would never have been able to learn to control my temper. I wouldn't be able to (actually, really, truly) meditate. I have, with his help, discovered the infinite nature of the universe. He has shown me what courage and love and friendship look like. And he has also shown me what the advice of a true and loyal friend can be like. I've never seen him flinch from telling me the hard things, and even when he is, he's always there to offer a shoulder. He's seen and taken care of me sick almost as many times as the girls. It means a lot to me to have him as a part of my family.

5. I am thankful for Felix, who has been a great addition to our coven. She's done so much (unwittingly I think) to improve me as a teacher and a mentor. She's a wonderful, beautiful person and a hugely inspired artist. She inspires me every time I speak with her. She's also a great person to just sit and talk with, or sit and write with, and I'm always thankful for her company. She's proved to me that yes, I can be friends with a girl because there are some out there who don't irritate me to death.

6. I am thankful for my improved relationship with my family. Things are never going to be perfect, but I've finally found balance there. As a result, I am at peace with myself and my past for the first time in my life. I have moved past my resentment, and learned to let my cynicism take a break...because of it I find my family is much more willing to give me a break. It works out for all of us.

7. I am thankful for the good health of my friend Bobcat, who has struggled this year with cancer. She's is such a brave and amazing woman. Her life changed, and her dreams changed so much when this happened to her. Through it all she has been incredible- if I can grow to have half the grace and humor that she has I will be a better person indeed.

8. I am thankful for my extended family, the one I have gained through Kitten and Sakura. They're wonderful people and I've never felt more supported and loved in my life.

9. I am thankful for my blogger friends. I never tell them enough, and I should. Aravis, Swiss, Mark, Flash- you guys have seen me at my best and my worst. You have loved me through all of it. You have talked me down when I was afraid, or upset. You have continued to post and tell me about your lives and it has given me the hope and courage and laughter to get through. The strength of heart that you have has been an inspiration to me, and there isn't  day that goes by that I don't think of you and thank deity that I have you in my life. 

10. I am thankful for NaNoWriMo. Now, before you laugh...this program got me started novelling properly. It gave me the courage to send out my first queries. It gave me the laughter and support I needed to realize that yes, I could be a novelist if I wanted to be. That's huge for me. This year it is providing me with an opportunity I will not pass up, and hopefully will have been the means of me finally getting my first novel published. That is huge.

11. I am thankful for the job I quit. I am. I learned a lot about myself and people. I came out of my shell. I have skills I would never have had if I hadn't worked there. It also brought me Spice, Shorty, Flyguy and Adidas, who through everything have been beautiful and wonderful friends.

12. I am thankful that I am now not working. I am now following my ambitions. Not many people have that chance and I am happy to have it.

13. I am thankful for my cats. They're funny, amazing little creatures who remind me every day how life can be an adventure.

14. I am thankful for my talents. I might not have many, but the ones I have give me joy and a sense of peace. Some of them are things I will never be able to use as a career, but they make me happy. Some of them will hopefully enable me to make a better life for myself. Either way, its a blessing to have things that give me joy in my life.

15. I am thankful that my family is able to provide for itself. There are so many people in the world who can't. Knowing that I will go to bed every night with a full stomach with a roof over my head is amazing.

16. I am thankful for cigarettes. Stop being indignant. I like them and though they aren't healthy, they give me pleasure and so I'm glad I have them. One day I'll hopefully stop. In the mean time, I am glad I have access tobacco that tastes good.

17.I am thankful that there are amazing artists in this world. People like Brandi Carlile and Katie Herzig, writers like Laurrel Hamilton and Erin Hunter and Johnathan Franzen remind me why this is a wonderful world to live in. They give me hope that there is more beauty and talent in the world than we thought there was. They give me hope that my generation might just make a mark on humankind that is more than ugliness.

18. I am thankful- despite my ranting- that I live in the US. There's a lot I don't like about my country. But there are many wonderful things about the place I live. I only hope that things can get better. In the mean time, we've got it pretty good whether we realize it or not.

19. I am thankful that I am not the person I wanted to be when I was eighteen. I had a lot of ideas about the world, and a lot of hopes for myself. I would have been an interesting person had I realized those dreams. I would not, however, be who I am now. And I truly believe that I am becoming the best person I can be. I am not yet, but I will slowly get there.

20. I am thankful for my grandparents. Without them I would have never made it. My grandmother gave me support and shelter and love when I thought there was none left to be had. My grandfather kept me from starving myself when I couldn't stand to look in the mirror and face what stared back at me. Both of them shaped my ideas about life. Both of them have given me strength when I didn't think I would ever find any. They have, and still are, one of the greatest gifts to my life.

21. I am thankful for friendships I have lost. Don't get me wrong, I am not always glad people leave my life. However, each time they do, I learn something more about myself. This last year I have had several people leave my life. I was sorry for it at the time, and looking back sometimes it still feels wrong. Still, the more I walk the path I have chosen, the more I see things clearly. I am happy with my decisions. Some of them, unwittingly, helped me to make some very hard ones. End the end time will tell whether or not I was right, but as of now, I am a very happy person who is still managing to hold on. And that makes me proud.

22. I am thankful for my religion. I won't preach. You know I don't do that. I will say this, my fully becoming a witch has totally changed my outlook on life. I am a different person now, and a better one.

23. I am thankful for my phone and my computer. Its another thing that seems shallow, but its also something that keeps me connected to the people in my life. That's important to me.

24. I am thankful that I am clean. It took a lot of will to get myself that way, and having people in my life who helped me was huge. I know people still that struggle with addiction every day and I am so proud and happy that it is something that I can move beyond. It wasn't easy, some days it isn't still, but the fact that I have spent over 12 years of my life free from addiction means everything to me, because it means I am in control of who I am.

25. I am thankful for all the silly, shallow, frivolous things in my life that make me happy. My underwear, my clothes, my hairbrush...I am thankful for the paintings and books in my house. I am thankful for nice meals and evenings out. I am thankful for being able to afford both glasses and contacts. I am thankful for warm blankets and candles and lots of cleaning supplies to keep my house nice and trips to places I love. Those are all things that are not necessities that make me happy. But I am thankful for them anyway.

26. I am thankful I have learned to love and respect myself. I used to not. I used to think that I had to make everyone else happy, and do what they told me. I thought I had to be perfect. I thought I had to be everything to everyone without thinking of my own happiness. I have learned that is not true. I have learned that I deserve love and respect too.

27. I am thankful that I have love in my life. There is so much love I can't even believe it. Its wonderful to be someone who knows there are people who think the world wouldn't be as great a place without you in it. That may be ego...but its nice all the same. I like to know I am loved.

28. I am thankful that I have the freedom to make my own choices. I have no one  in my life anymore who doesn't tell me I am able to do that. There is no one who makes me feel bad for wanting things, or having my own ideas or desires. That's not to say I don't have people who aren't willing to tell me how it is. Believe me, I do, but they are also the people in my life who understand my desires and wants and would help me to achieve them. Sometime that means doing it my way and sometimes that means getting their help- but in the end I have people who are supportive of my life path.

29. This is probably going to sound crude...I'm thankful for sex. Seriously. Through it I have learned so much about who I am. I have learned about boundaries. I have learned about what I can do. I have learned about love and loss and fear and trust. I have learned about simple pleasure. I have learned about healing. Sex, to me, is so many things and not all of them (in fact most of them) have very little to do with the act itself.

30. I am thankful for the life I have. All the things above this probably point to that, but it bears being told. I have not always felt that way. Fortunately for me, I wake up every morning and think of all these wonderful things I have listed- and other ones- and I am glad to be me. I know not every person can say that. I am quite a lucky woman. There are people in my life who inspire and encourage me. I have every hope for my future. I have everything I need and a lot of things I never hoped for. I am so blessed. I wake up every morning and know it. And if that's not something to be thankful for, I don't know what is.

I hope your lives are just as blessed as mine is.
AGxx

We're Zany to the Max!

Alright, its time for another survey. This one is titled "50 questions you've never been asked" and I think its pretty close to accurate. I think I have not seen most of these questions on a survey before. So, here we go.

1. What's your favorite candle scent? I happen to like mullberry a lot. I also like anything that is rich smelling like plum or cranberry. I do not like candles that smell like cookies or something. Those things not only freak me out, they usually smell awful when you burn them.

2. What female celebrity do you wish was your sister? Um, I like Ellen DeGeneres a lot. I think I would relate to her. If I had to pick one young enough to actually be my sister, I think I would really like Jennifer Lawrence. She seems like an interesting and creative gal.

3, What male celebrity do you wish was your brother? This is a hard one, since I'm not into a lot of male celebrities. I mean, Elton John would be cool, but he's old enough to be my dad. I suppose I could pick Josh Hutcherson and have a matched Hunger Games pair, right?

4. How old do you think you will be when you get married? I got married when I was 27. I probably would have thought I would get married younger when I was a teenager, but then, what do you know when you're that age???

5. Do you know a hoarder? No, unless you count the fact that I have lots and lots of books.

6. Can you do a split? No. I used to be able to but I am not that flexible anymore.

7. How old were you when you learned to ride a bike? I think I was about seven.

8. How many oceans have you swam in? One. I've swam in the Atlantic.

9. How many countries have you been to? Two- Kuwait and England.

10. Is anyone in your family in the army? Yes. I have had several members of my family serve in the military, although none of them are on active duty now.

11. What would you name your daughter if you had one? Lydia Frances

12. What would you name your son if you had one? Bruce Alan

13. What's the worst grade you got on a test? Uh, an F? I've failed one before. I couldn't tell you the percentage.

14. What was your favorite television show as a child? Animaniacs.

15. What did you dress up as for Halloween when you were eight? I think I went as a witch that year

16. Have you read The Hunger Games, Harry Potter or Twilight? Yes, I have read all three series several times and I liked all of them.

17. Would you rather have an American accent or a British accent? It seems really pretentious for me to want a British one, doesn't it? They're cool and all, but I think I better settle for sounding like I come from where I live.

18. Did your mother go to college? Yes she did.

19. Are your grandparents still married? They were when my grandfather died.

20. Have you ever taken karate lessons? Nope.

21. Do you know who Kermit the Frog is? Of course I do.

22. What's the first amusement park you went to? Uh, I think Silver Dollar City in Branson, Mo. There's pictures to that effect, anyway.

Here's where I gave up on the formatting.  

23. What language, besides your native language, would you like to be fluent in? Um, I'd like to speak French better than I do, and I need to learn Spanish, but I would really love to learn Cantoneese.

 24. Do you spell the color as grey or gray? Grey.  

25. Is your father bald? I don't know.

 26. Do you know triplets? Yes, I do. Or, at least, I know one of them.  

27. Do you prefer Titanic or The Notebook? Both are depressing, but I like watching Titanic just because of Rose's clothes. Shallow of me, isn't it? 

28. Have you ever had Indian food? Yes. I think its decent. I can't cook it to save my life though 




29. What's the name of your favorite restaurant? Um, I have a lot that I like. There's an italian place in my hometown called Avanzare. Its pretty good.  

30. Have you ever been to Olive Garden? Yes. My mother works at one.  

31. Do you belong to any warehouse stores (Costco, BJ's, etc.)? Kitten has a Sam's membership. So yes? 

32. What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender? David Wayne. I got off easy I guess. 

33. If you have a nickname, what is it? Panther. Alecya. Those are the one's I'll repeat.  

34. Who's your favorite person in the world? Kitten. No question there. 

35. Would you rather live in a rural area or in the suburbs? Or in a city? I want to live in a city. Portland to be exact. I suppose I could live with the burbs, but I don't want to. 

36. Can you whistle? Yes. Are there still people who can't???

37. Do you sleep with a nightlight? No. I have to have complete dark or I can't sleep. 

38. Do you eat breakfast every morning? Yes, although its not always what Kitten would call a healthy breakfast 

39. Do you take any pills or medication daily? Nope 

40. What medical conditions do you have? I'm hypoglycemic. That sucks. And I have migraines. Sometimes I suffer from a severe lack of common sense. Otherwise, I'm pretty healthy. 

41. How many times have you been to the hospital? I couldn't even count.  

42. Have you ever seen Finding Nemo? Yes. Its a good movie and I was mad I missed it in 3d 

43. Where do you buy your jeans? Usually at a thrift store.   

44. What's the last compliment you got? I can't remember? Wait- someone told me yesterday that I always look put together. That was nice, since I think I look like a mess most of the time.  

45. Do you usually remember your dreams in the morning? I try to. I especially try to remember the weird ones or the ones people I know are in, because I figure they're important.  

46. What flavor tea do you enjoy? Regular tea? I like Earl Grey. Kitten makes some pretty good custom blends though. I'll drink almost any tea... 

47. How many pairs of shoes do you currently own? Without going and counting, probably about 18-20 pairs, although I only wear about 6 with any regularity. 

48. What religion will you raise your children to practice? None. I won't have kids. But if I did, I would give them the chance to make their own decision once I thought they were old enough.  

49. How old were you when you found out that Santa wasn't real? I don't even remember. I must have been young, because I don't recall being devastated or anything. 

The last one was why I have a tumblr. Which I don't. So I guess it was 49 questions. Still, some interesting ones, don't you think?

Ain't That America?

Wow. Election Day is finally over. More than that- Election Night is over. What's the difference? To me, its like night and day. Sort of like yesterday I did community service by coaching a pee-wee football team and last night I watched the Super Bowl.

In my house politics are like sports when it comes to viewing. We're very passionate. I'm fortunate that both Kitten and Oscelot are as nuts as I am (though they have less stamina, I was the only on who made it to President Obama's speech) so we went to vote yesterday afternoon and then settled in for a big night.

As most of you know, I don't own a television. So our election coverage was watched via online stream from NBC News. Bless their hearts. I love them for it. Coverage started at six my time, so we ordered a pizza at about six and we drug our couch out of the living room and into the library. We set up some footstools and then settled in for a long, long night.

It was a long night too. Believe me. There was a good deal of time I was on pins and needles. We didn't get up unless they were going to a scheduled break. We didn't do anything unless we had the chance of getting out of the room (usually to the bathroom) and back again without missing anything. There was one point in the night when Gov. Romney and Pres. Obama were tied, and Kitten missed it so I trucked into the bathroom to tell her immediately. (What? Touchdown Romney? Damnit...)

As the night wore on we became more anxious. I was dying to get results on our local and state elections because we had a nationally recognized senate race. Fortunately they put us out of our misery about that around ten. The rest of the night was us, engrossed, as we listened to political commentary and waited for Chuck Todd to show us the numbers in the swing counties and then for Brian Williams to interrupt so we could watch them call a state and then put it out on the ice.

When they finally -finally- called Ohio for the President, around eleven or so, our house erupted in cheers. (You're not surprised are you?) and we had a victory dance with our cats. Oscelot went to bed, saying she would watch the speeches in the morning. Then the unthinkable happened. Gov. Romney wouldn't concede Ohio. What??? Surely not? So Kitten and I went back to the screen and waited anxiously as the results from every other swing state rolled in. Colorado and Nevada...was that enough? Then we heard that Miami-Dade was not counting any more ballots as of midnight. What???

Finally, finally, Kitten went to bed too, apologizing that she couldn't stay up later. Hell, I don't blame her. Both of them had to work this morning after all. So I cozied up with the cats and waited for Gov. Romney to make the call. And waited.

Finally, the call was made and I listened to Gov. Romney's concession speech. I'll say this. I never would have voted for him. But he was dignified, passionate and caring. You could see in his face that he was heartbroken. You could hear in his voice that he truly cares for America. And that? It made all the difference to me. He is a good man. I don't agree with him. But had I seen that man on stage all year, I would have liked him better.

His speech down, I only waited on my new president. I was anxious and tired- but I would not miss this. His speech, to me, was beautiful. It was not just rhetoric. It was not just victory. It was a call for unity. And that, my friends, is what I learned while I was watching last night.

A lot of pundits say there was no mandate. A lot of them say that the country is more divided than ever. What I saw was Americans giving their elected officials a hard rap of the butt and telling them to get back to work and to get it right this time. Nothing changed, and everything changed.

I had an interesting conversation this morning with Sakura's aunt on facebook. She's a conservative, and she asked if we could have a discussion about gay marriage because she didn't understand why it was such a big deal that it be called marriage. After the long discussion it turns out that we agree. She doesn't think a church should be forced to marry two people if they don't want to, neither do I. But she does agree that all people have the same fundamental rights. We call it a draw, because it all boils down to the semantics of the word. But today, for the first time, I saw someone from the right who was willing to engage in discourse about a controversial topic important to both of us, and saw us walk away with an answer we could both live with.

That is what needs to happen now. I pray, I hope, and I will that there will be this kind of talk in Washington. I hope that there is a clear sense that four years ago we elected a bunch of liberals and it didn't work. We swapped them out for conservatives in the mid-term elections. That didn't work. Now we have a nice mix, similar but different, and we're ready for them to lay aside the bullshit and the party politics and talk. I think last night was America saying maybe we don't always agree. What's best for me might be bad for you, but maybe we can find something that is simply good for all of us. I hope this time we will have the opportunity to compromise and become a more socially minded electorate.

I can hope right?

Oh, and for those keeping tally, because I was-

*First openly gay senator elected.
*First female handicapped war veteran elected
* First openly pansexual elected to congress
*Four states voted to legalize or decriminalize marijuana (I don't like it, but can't we spend money fighting drugs like meth for a change?)
* Three states legalized gay marriage and one voted to repeal a constitutional amendment banning it.

This is huge. HUGE. 

I can't tell you enough how excited I am. Or how exhausted. One of the highlights of the night for me was Sakura calling me at like, eleven thirty to celebrate with me. It was wonderful.

The game is over, let the games begin.

Thank you, thank you, to every person who went and voted yesterday. Today is a new day for all of us.

AGxx
*NO SENATOR who publicly supported anti-abortion legislation for rape victims was elected.