I Love The Road, and I've Been Blessed, But I Love You Best

I'm leaving for vacation in two days. I can't wait.

I must admit, though, there is no small amount of nervousness involved with going away as well. Part of it is leaving home for so long. I've never been away from home for three weeks before, not without me doing something work or school related. Naturally, I worry about my garden, and my cats, and in general the strange and stormy weather we have this time of year. Fortunately, Sakura, Felix and Spice will all be at the house, taking care of it and making sure all goes well. Of course, money is part of it too...you can't leave home for that long and not be working and not worry a little bit. We've got the money we need put away, of course, but I always think "what if there is some sort of emergency?" I'm trying to let tomorrow worry about tomorrow though.

I've never been camping with Kitten before, nor Oscelot. We'll be travelling with KMom and I've only been on a three day trip with her once before. I worry that we'll get on each other's nerves while we're away. Of course, we're driving, and there's the roads to think about. And all the rain they're supposed to get in South Carolina while we're there. I can live with rain, so long as its not too cold. I hate cold and wet. Warm and wet I can cope with- and by all accounts its supposed to be nice and hot while we're there.

Otherwise, I am truly excited. Its been such a very long time since I've had a camping trip. Not many of my previous partners were big on the outdoors, so this will be an exciting and pleasant change. I'm frankly surprised that Kitten and I haven't camped before. But this will make a great start.

Of course, it won't be camping all the time. We're going to Charleston first, and staying in a proper hotel. We'll be touring the city, visiting museums and I sincerely hope eating at a lot of fantastic restaurants. There's plenty, to be sure, I've looked them up. Charleston seems to be a foodie paradise, and I like soul food. It should be a good time. We'll visit Fort Sumter, of course, and see some of the other interesting civil war sites. I've got my hopes up we'll get a chance to meet EG Coyle, a fabulous photographer that KMom knows from past days. I really admire his work. I'd like Kitten to meet him and his wife- I've got a hankering to do one of his private sessions one day soon.

Once we leave Charleston we're heading off to the low country, and we'll be camping right by a lighthouse, which I think will be a great time. I picked a site right by the ocean, which should be lovely. I've never seen a tide pool, so I'm looking forward to exploring. You can swim in the ocean where we're staying, and that should be lovely too. Of course, you have to watch for jellyfish and coral snakes...so maybe not. But its nice to know the option is there. I do love the ocean.

I'm cooking for us while we're away and I'm planning on making the meals absolutely lovely. I like to eat real food when I camp. I couldn't make it on hot dogs and sandwiches the whole time. I'm making chicken parmesan that first night. We'll be having stews and stir frys and even turkey and dressing. No sir, we won't be hungry if I can help it. That should be nice. I love a good dinner, and by a fire makes it even better, I think. I imagine that I'll be spending a lot of evenings by the fire, playing cards and having a lovely time.

I picked up some books, too, to read on the way down. We have a hard time agreeing on a genre, so I picked up some childrens books, Caldacott and Newberry winners all, so that we could enjoy something light and happy while we drive. The shortness of the books will also be nice so that we can change if we need to, or get bored. Though I don't think that will be a problem. I've got some that they've never read and some that I have been longing to read again, so it should be very nice. Of course, if it gets too boring, I'll pack something more adult, but I'd rather we all be happy, and I think we can with the ones I've chosen.

I'm planning on taking a lot of pictures. Once we get off the coast we'll be headed to a state park outside the capitol city and we'll visit the capitol building and the zoo, certainly. I'm planning on getting Oscelot in a canoe for the first time. I know she'll enjoy it. There will be lots of walks and hiking. I think it will be fun. When we hit the northwest we'll be in waterfall country, and I won't be able to help myself with the pictures there. I bought an extra memory card, knowing I will want to takes hundreds upon hundreds of pictures.

I suppose I am more excited than nervous. I want this to be special for Kitten. Its for her, after all. (She just graduated from college! Aren't we all so proud.) I want her to enjoy herself and make tons of lovely memories for her to have always.

I'll see you on the other side. With lots of pictures of course.
AGxx

Now Tell Me What's Your Sign? Always The Same Old Line...

So I've ventured into the world of online dating. Again. And before you ask, no nothing has happened to me and the girls. I'm not even looking for someone to date. Its a rather funny story, really, how this happened; and now that I've gone in, it seems like I am Alice down the rabbit hole, I can't seem to get out of it.

The other day we were joking about online dating sites. I was telling someone at work how long ago I signed up for an account on OK Cupid because our roommate at the time, Guitar Hero, had gotten one and I was not entirely comfortable with the idea of her bringing people to our house. So I got online to check things out. In the end, I ended up meeting Bobcat, who didn't take my very tongue in cheek profile seriously at all, and we became friends. It is through her that I met Oscelot, and the rest, as they say, is history.

It was while we were joking about the sites that Flyguy mentioned his roommate had an account on POF, which up until then I had never heard of, though everyone else had seemed to. He was laughing about the women that messaged his roomie, Nox, and how his replies were both hilarious and scathing. I was intrigued. In part because outside of seeing pictures of him, and Flyguy's anecdotes about their misadventures together, I know nothing of him. What I do know, though, is that he seems like a really cool guy- the kind I would like to hang out with. Flyguy seems impervious to my hinting that I was interested in meeting him, or perhaps, hindsight being 20/20, knows that Nox would have nothing to do with a shallow, boring thing like me. Either way, I wanted to look at this profile. So I signed up for an account.

In the last four days I have had nearly 50 messages from men in my area wanting to speak with me. I am astounded. In part because I originally set out to make my profile as boring as possible. I mean, when you can only read the first two lines about a person before viewing their profile, and they only mention a love of outdoors, gardening and hot tea and books, who would be interested? I wouldn't, if I were a guy....

The funny thing is, there seems to be some sort of market out there for women like me. That or the guys are simply looking at my picture and deciding to message me. It doesn't say a lot for them. I know I'm not ugly, but I am certainly not a knock out...it surprises me.

At the end of my profile, which I would like to say clearly states I am not looking for a boyfriend, I mention that if you actually do want to speak with me, you should tell me your first pet's name and what your favorite color is. To me, its a signal they made it all the way through my profile and know how to follow instructions. If I were actually looking, this would be something I would be interested in. I also, rather snarkily, mention that I have no use for people who don't know what an Oxford comma is, or how to use it.

Of the 50 or so that have messaged me, only five total have responded with answers to those questions. The rest of them were dull, pathetic, or both. I had one guy tell me his new favorite color was the color of my lips. I rolled my eyes. I  had one tell me that he hated going to botanical gardens, but he would pretend to like them if it made me happy. That made me feel both sorry for him and annoyed at the same time. One told me that he thought he could whip me in the batting cages (something I mentioned I would like to do on my first date) and I looked at his profile- he's a baseball coach. I almost sent him a message asking if he would correct my stance for me. Almost.

I had a 62 year old man looking for a "playmate and traveling companion" message me. I was astounded. I suppose there are women out there who would like a man like that- older, accomplished and looking for a younger lady to spoil...but to me, it seems wrong. I mean, he's older than my mother. That just seems weird. Then again, that may be my bias from relationships with people who are younger than me peeking through. He also sent me a "bottle of wine and chocolates" from his digital credit account, which I think is like farmville or something on FB. Kitten teased me he was spending good points on me, the very least I could do is respond. I felt like that would be unfair.

Several of the men messaging me were divorced. Quite a few of them have children. I wouldn't have bothered with them in real life either. Part of it is that I have old fashioned notions about marriage. Part of it is because I know they didn't read the part on my profile where I mention I am child-free. A few were drug users...who admits to that??? I wouldn't. But then, I will now, so maybe its not a huge difference and I just think it is.

Most of the messages were something along the line of "hey" or "Whatsup??" which, I swear, leaves me breathless as a pickup line. It truly does. My two favorites, though, I think, were the guy who told me I was "kinda cute" and the one who told me "Im a grammer natzi to, lolz, tho I don't know what an oxford comma is" Both times I rolled my eyes. Am I too scathing? Too picky? Maybe, maybe I am. Thank God and Goddess I am not a straight woman looking for an actual date...

Of all the people I've seen and heard from one, just one, seems like the kind of person I would like to talk to.I messaged him back and he seems like someone I would want to be friends with. I've heard nothing so far, so maybe I am far more boring than I appear to be.

You're curious, I'm sure, of whether I actually got in touch with Nox. I did find his profile. I also sent him a teasing message. His response was somewhat less than enthralling and more than abrasive. I sent him one in reply, and the last he sent me was made him sound like a downright asshole. It wasn't complimentary to either of us, to be frank. The funny thing is, its what I like about him. He's very real, very emotional and very forceful. If you know me at all you know that's the kind of person I find myself drawn to, for the most part. I'm at an impasse, though, because he seems to think I am some starstruck girl making a brave attempt at getting a guy to date her, which couldn't be farther from the truth. I've waffled over the idea of simply messaging him back and calling truce, telling him that I just wanted to meet him. But then, its that sort of contrivance, so like me and so unlike most people, that turns a lot of people like him off. Ah, well. It is what it is.

In the end, I think I shall simply delete the account. Its been entertaining, but dear lord, its discouraging. No wonder people are always talking about how hard it is to find a good person to date when they're past the age of 20 and single. I'm glad I'm not in that position.

I have learned, however, that I do know my own personality and my own preferences for people very well, even on paper. I think I'm able to distinguish what I want and what I don't want. Truly, I've discovered not a little bit of prejudice in me. It seems unfair, maybe, to have such a high standard. I mean, when someone sends me a message and pours their heart and life history out to a total stranger, that takes a lot of trust. Would it be fair, if I were really looking, to dismiss them out of hand simply because I think they scanned my profile, or were only interested in my looks? Maybe. But there you have it.

And I've found I am quite picky about the way a person looks too. I never realized it quite until now, but I surround myself almost exclusively with people I find beautiful. Now, maybe other people wouldn't agree with my assessment of my friends, but there isn't a single one I can look at and say I can't find attractive. And I don't do it on purpose! I truly don't. Then again, the personalities of all of my friends are beautiful too, and that makes them extra gorgeous in my eyes.

Oh, dear, the things you realize about yourself when you go on an internet dating site. You know, those lovely psychological tests that they make you take? I was fascinated by them. For example, POF tells me that:

Perhaps the defining feature that sets me apart from most people is the exceptionally high standards that I set for myself. As someone who exerts little control over my actions, I may find that I commit social blunders that might offend other people and get yourself in trouble. Indeed, it’s possible that I might be criticized periodically for being unreliable or unable to “stay within the lines.” Nonetheless, I may still experience many short-lived pleasures and never be thought of as boring.

As someone high in openness, I have a strong appreciation for beauty, both in art and nature. Indeed, it’s likely that I am easily absorbed in music and art, as well as natural phenomena. Another aspect of my openness is my emotional insight; that is, I probably have good access to and awareness of my own emotions.

How terribly boring. I am pretty sure I was able to tell someone all of those things about myself without taking a test to find it out. Although I will say that my relationship needs assessment pretty well said that I need a partner who is just like Kitten, so I suppose I can't argue too much, can I?

Then again, I'm a free spirit and thinker so maybe that's what I am supposed to do anyway.

Do you think this odd fascination with this site is indicative of something being seriously wrong with me? Everyone I know is amused by it, and I think my stories of my misadventures, such as they are, have been entertaining. But to not be able to walk away, not just yet...Yeah, there's probably something wrong with me.

AGxx

Watch it Spin Around Into A Beautiful Oblivion

 Having had a lackluster Monday evening, despite all my efforts at making it otherwise, I was more than ready to head off to the fair yesterday. Nothing gets you over a serious case of the blahs like a good time with your friends, and my- did i have a good time!

When all was said and done there were seven of us that ended up going to the fair- Kitten, Oscelot, Sakura, myself, Shorty, Cookie (a coworker at Casa Bueno I've been dying to get to know better) and Flyguy, who met us up as soon as he got off of work.

The weather was perfect. I can't even imagine a better day to go. It was overcast, which was great after all of the days of relentless sunshine we've had. The weather was cooler too, which is an absolute necessity if you want to enjoy yourself. There's nothing worse that eating so much you feel sick when you already feel sick because of the heat. And rides? Much nicer when the ride seat doesn't scorch your leg when you sit down. We couldn't have
made a better day, honestly. And that's saying something, because in theory, we could have tried.

Everyone met up at our place so we could carpool. I was delighted when Cookie showed up bearing cookies for us. (Yep, that's how she's getting this name. How awesome is it, what a delightful, old fashioned, wonderful thing to do, to bring a gift to someone the first time you visit their home? I thought that tradition had passed her generation by completely. I was wrong.) We all sat and munched and chatted up everyone's recent personal life updates and had a grand time until it was time to leave.

Cookie and I ended up in Sakura's little toaster looking car, while Shorty headed off to ride with my ladies. We beat them to the fair, and had a few moments to let Cookie orient herself while we waited for them to meet us at the A&W. It was her first fair experience, and I was having a blast watching her take it all in.

In case you're curious, the photo, in order from left to right, is Cookie, Shorty, Me and Oscelot. Sakura took it, which is why he wasn't in it, and Kitten was off getting a Tater Twister, which is why she isn't in it. It was during our massive gorge break. We had giant turkey legs, cheese sticks, tornado taters, a caramel apple, hand dipped bubblegum ice cream and a couple sodas. Granted, we ate other stuff too...but that was our big sit down and eat break. We also split some nachos, root beer, three foot long corn dogs, some handmade lemonade and a bag of kettle corn.

I won't give you a blow by blow but the highlights, for me, were as follows:

While I was getting my caramel apple a group of very pretty women stopped me to ask about my tattoos. While we were chatting middle east culture, one of them whipped out a quart of hand picked blueberries. I demanded to know where she got them, because I love fresh fruit and I hadn't seen them. She said the stand was about to close (it was 9) but she insisted I take some, and so I let her hook me up with a handful of beautifully tart blueberries. They were really sweet. I was so surprised. Sometimes strangers can do nice things, eh? I wasn't so nice, I crammed the whole fistful in my mouth before I remembered my friends might want some too. oops.

Kitten and Sakura aren't really ride people, so after we got our ride armbands they went to bond in the E-plex, where all the exhibits were. I was glad for that, I like them spending time together. Me and the girls hit the midway and rode rides until we were giggling and dizzy. There was a huge slide you could race down in potato sack type things we did and it was awesome. (135 stairs, folks, it was tall) We rode the Himalaya, which is a set of cars that swing in a circle and speed up over time, dashing through paintings of the snow covered mountains. Its like a big kid's merry go round. I love it, its one of my favorite.

We waited in line to ride this giant swing looking thing that spun you around while you were swinging, called the Warrior and the kid on the ride before us puked. Cookie and I were fortunate enough to get the recently water washed puke seats. While we were riding, the swing shifted and made a loud mechanical noise. The girl in the seat behind us laughed and shouted "Oh, the sounds of safety" and we cracked up.

We went to look at the livestock and had an excellent time oogling mini-donkeys. We headed into the big barn and got to look at beef and milking cows, goats, horses and sheep. There was an exhibit where you could watch chickens hatch from the eggs. It was awesome. Cookie seemed to really like that, and she stayed long enough that a couple of teenagers asked if they were her chickens. She laughed and said to us, "Do I look like I own a bunch of chickens?" I made friends with a goat named Zeus, who I got at eye level with near his pen and he leaned out and licked my nose all over. Goat kisses are awesome. We also got to dodge all of the antique tractors as they shot out of the barn to take their places in the evening parade.

We took time out to wander the E-plex after eating and I loved looking at the quilts. I was totally foot in mouth when I told one of the ladies at the quilt stands that I loved the hand sewn quilts, because I think it takes more talent. I mentioned I liked a Civil War era second day dress down the aisle, but i would like it more if it were hand sewn. She coolly informed me it was. I was aghast. The seams were perfect! Turns out the woman who made it is a friend of hers and designs patterns for Butterick and McCalls. That explained a lot.

We went and ran to the karaoke stand and Oscelot and I sang a song each. It was fun, because there were total strangers everywhere, and I like preforming for strangers because there's less to be nervous about. I think I did okay. Oscelot, as usual, blew me out of the water. When I got down, everyone was munching funnel cake and deep fried snickers bars and Flyguy had arrived. We tromped off to get him an arm band for rides, because I wasn't going to have him only riding two because he didn't want to waste money. Oscelot and Kitten paid for his band.

We took back to the midway and did the giant slide again, the huge swings, the twisty swing, and of course the Himalaya. I watched while he and Cookie and Shorty rode the giant swinging pirate ship and giggled listening to all of them scream.

We paid for a round of water pistol game for everyone, and I won a giant pink stuffed snake. Its longer than I am. It was great fun to watch Kitten wrap it around her. For anyone who's seen any of my photos on FB or at home, they'll know why I didn't pick a bear or a puppy...Kitten and I have had a stuffed snake photo gag on all of our trips since we started dating. Now we have one of our own.

I about died laughing here too, because the guy running the target game was a mouth piece. The object of the game is to sit at your post, and when the bell goes off shoot water at a target. As you do, it blows up a balloon. When the first balloon pops, the game is over. The popped balloon person wins. How many people play determines the size of your prize. When we paid for everyone, it made sure that we'd get whichever one we wanted. I told the guy I wanted the giant pink snake as I sat down. He looked all of us over, Three lesbians, Shorty, Cookie and Sakura, and looked at Sakura and said, conspiratorially, " I think the girls have this one, sir, if you'll forgive me, I'll bet they're better at aiming for the hole..." and he winked. The joke, of course, being that most of the women were recognizably lesbians and Sakura is obviously gay. We all got a huge kick out of it. When I won (I never win!!!) he laughed and told me i must have really wanted that snake.

We also went to ride the one ride which looks like a ferris wheel tipped on its side, but the cars hand from it like clothes on a line. When you get it, it spins, and the cars tilt sideways. The ferris wheel part then moves up, so it looks like an actual ferris wheel and you're going almost upside down at one point. The girls had mentioned wanting to ride it earlier, and I was game, even though the look of the ride terrified me. I ended up in a car with Shorty, who reassured me it wasn't that bad, she had ridden it several times the year before. She got in the back, and told me to lean against her, since I'd end up pressed against her anyway. I was a little nervous, because Flyguy said that this ride had made him throw up the year before. I normally can hold it in. I've never not made it to a trash can or the grass, but I look at Flyguy as one of the manliest, toughest people I know. If it did him in, what would it do to me? I shouldn't have worried. Shorty was a comfort to me, and honestly, I felt very safe next to her, which I suppose is a comment on how much I like and trust her, because normally I would require Kitten and Oscelot to feel that safe. Both of them were sitting the ride out. It was an excellent ride, and I laughed nearly the whole time.

I'll tell you though, despite all the rides and the food, which were awesome like always...this was the best fair experience I've ever had. And it had nothing to do with those things, or the perfect weather, the low crowds or the freedom I felt to do anything I liked. It was my friends.

There's something really special about bonding with people you love at the fair. i got to know Cookie better, and I found that she's as honestly sweet as she seems. She fun and adventurous. She makes me laugh, which is hard to do...although less hard with the group we were in. I didn't mind the close quarters or the squishing on the rides I rode with her. And while I have no bubble with the people I love, I have a huge bubble with people I don't know well. I am, apparently, going to love Cookie the way I love all my good friends.

I loved watching Shorty and Oscelot (both the same very short height) lean their heads in and giggle over something. I loved watching Sakura and Kitten take videos of us and laugh at the faces we were making. There's something great in watching your friends with their heads tilted back, smiles so wide they are almost grimaces, laughing full throat with absolute joy at nothing at all. I loved the silliness and the randomness of our little group. I loved being able to share everything with everyone. I loved that we were unafraid to dance or shake or be silly to the incredibly loud rock music plays on all of the rides. I loved the pure, unadulterated happiness of all of my friends. I loved being able to snug up against my friends on all of those rides and whomever it was, know I was as safe, happy and joyful as I would ever be.  I was exhilarated as we each threw our hands in the air and let ourselves be thrown one way then another, because we didn't care so long as we were all together and laughing.

Call me morbid, but if there were some sort of accident, if something did happen...I couldn't have gone a better way last night- my good friends around me, happy, full of life and not wanting for a single thing. Yeah- the fair is wild, a little dangerous, and sometimes creepy- but there's a safety in the joy and fullness of being with those you love that sort of cancels all of that out.

At eleven thirty, half an hour before the midway was supposed to close, there was a brilliant streak of lightning across the sky. Almost immediately, the lights on all the rides went off and the park went quiet. The sky opened up and the rain came pouring down over all of us- finishing us off at last as a group of stinking, hot, sticky people who very desperately needed someone to tell us to stop. I would have gone all night had they let me. But nature knew, just that moment, when we were done, and so we hugged Flyguy goodbye (he was in a different parking lot)  and the six of us trooped to our cars in the rain, heads back, laughing and smiling that were finally getting rain at last. It was if, in that moment, the drought that has had sway over our area of the country, stressing and frying all of us, couldn't hold sway over the fullness of what we were when we are together. It, too, had to give in to our joy.

We didn't run, we didn't walk briskly, we only laughed our way out. We groaned, as we reached our cars, because it almost stopped for a moment. One of us ask d if that was it, and as if in response, the rain came back, harder than before, and we ducked shrieking and laughing into our cars.

On the drive home I smoked my first cigarette in almost six hours and the world spun quietly around me. After goodbyes were said, the cats were fed and I had shed my soaking wet jean shorts, I crawled under the blankets and closed my eyes.

This, I thought, is what bliss is.

AGxx

Put In My Token, Rode the Tilt-a Whirl, and I Was Giggling and Dizzy

Tomorrow I am going to the fair with a group of my friends. Its exciting for me, because I haven't been in probably four years, and before that its only been off and on since I was a teenager.

Until recently I was unaware of how many people had never experienced a fair. I always took it for granted that people knew what I was talking about, would have childhood memories of the fair, would appreciate it the way I do. I was wrong.

Even within my circle of acquaintance I have discovered a serious lack of fair knowledge. This, to me, is a travesty. So I have set out with a couple of pictures and my own personal knowledge to educate you.

The fair is something promoted by the county every summer. Its a big gathering that combines livestock and vegetation shows with arts competition and midway excitement. Its a big to-do here in my area of the country. Remember Charlotte's Web? Wilbur was shown at a fair.

There's plenty of animals to look at too, everything from horses of all breeds to cattle and sheep. There's other critters too- mules and goats and chickens and stuff. All of them judged like a dog would be at a dog show. The ribbons are all posted in their pens, and you can see the winners when you walk through the stables on the back half of the fair grounds.

There's also competitions in photography and artwork, handicrafts and cooking. You can see, and sometimes taste, jellies, jams, pies and cakes all made with an eye for winning one of the blue ribbons. In the same arena that there's food, flower and vegetable competitions there's people selling all kinds of wares- necklaces, knives, makeup, home spa systems, life insurance- you name it. Its fun to walk around and collect the free pens and back scratchers, combs and kazoos they all pass out. In the middle there's a graphologist who will analyze your handwriting and tell you all about your personality. There's city and county betterment associations who want donations. Booths where you can win prizes for a price, and the proceeds benefit charity. There's also any number of politicians vying for your vote, and I don't remember going in an election year, so maybe we will avoid that area.

There's also a grandstand where every night a concert or show of some sort takes place. There's stuff there during the day too, local bands and talent competitions. Their fun to watch and listen to. This year there's a truck and tractor pull, a "drifting" exhibition on the raceway, Glenn Campbell is preforming on his farewell tour, and country music star Deirks Bently is preforming. In past years there's been more hard rock in the lineup...I remember there being some bands that I wanted to see, although not so much this year.

To be honest, though, the midway is probably my favorite part. I love the rides, despite the fact that there are always people who tell you about a cousin of a sister-in-law of a friend who's aunt died on this or that ride because it was poorly put together. Yeah, the structures are temporary. But the people who have been doing the fair midway for our county have been doing it almost as long as I have been alive. I have never seen an accident at our fair, or heard of one. On top of that, I happen to like the non-inside out rides, more like the ferris wheel and the scrambler. I like the ones that take you in circles and make it to where centrifugal force pushes you to the outside and you squash your seat mate. This thing on the left? Forget it. I went one year and rode something like that and was terrified the whole damn time. Don't get me wrong, there's a few dangerous ones I like, but I usually stick to the bunny slopes. The fair runs high on giant swings and things that simply lift you three or four stories in the air and spin you in open space until you puke. Not my style. And the really scary stuff? I'll save that for an amusement park. I won't ride a fair roller coaster, but you bet I'll get in the bumper boats or the bumper cars.

Scattered all along this midway full of terrifying and awesome rides is a ton of midway games, where you can play slot like machines to win pocket knives, toss golf balls into fishbowls to win knives, throw darts at balloons or shoot water pistols into a target to win giant stuffed animals you have no use for. Do you need any of those things? No, not really, but its a good time anyway.  And nothing really shows someone you love them like winning them a teddy bear or stuffed tiger twice their size, right?

I'm particularly partial to the duck pond, run by one of the local charities, where you use nets to catch brightly colored rubber ducks. Each one corresponds with a prize. I always seem to get turtle wax, I'm not sure why. I also usually get some sort of ice cream bar, some mardi gras style beads, a comb or a hair brush...oh, lots of stuff. I love it, and each duck wins something. I almost always spend twenty bucks on duck nets, and come away with a bunch of nothing, but its the thought that counts. The money goes to charity and I always have a fun time playing. Its great to see the little old men who run the thing calling "a lovely necklace for the lady! Throw in an ice cream too...she's awfully pretty!" I get just a huge kick out of it.

And for all of you out there who think that wrath and lust are my big sins, take a moment to appreciate the time of the year for me where gluttony takes the wheel. Everywhere, and I mean everywhere, there are food carts with things tempting me to eat. Everyone makes fun of me because I normally eat myself sick, and I'll ride more rides and then keep eating. But I can't say no!

There's an old fashioned, honest to goddess A&W Root Beer Stand that still sells pint jugs of root beer with the little plastic animals on the edge of the jug. Just like in the fifties. To some patrons, its a throwback to their childhood, to me, its a way of experiencing something every person in my family has loved for as long as I can remember. And with that root beer, there's no question, you have to get a foot long corn dog. They're so good! And the last time I went I finally broke down and ate it with mustard, the way you're supposed to, instead of with ketchup and it was delicious.

Outside of the A&W there's stands selling burgers, nachos, philly cheesesteak sandwiches. There's an air conditioned (!) Hiland Dairy store where you can sit and eat ice cream and burgers like a malt shop. You can find really, really good barbeque everywhere, even a chicken friend steak sandwich. And that's just a start. There's farmers who roast whole ears of corn and then shuck them for you, dipping them in hot butter and letting you sprinkle on whatever seasoning strikes your fancy (and there's always at least two dozen kinds). Potato twisters, where they take the potato, spiral it along a stick and fry it, are not to be missed. Giant blooming onions that are crispy golden brown on the outside and soft on the inside....and they all taste better because they're at the fair. Its a universal truth.

And Sweets! Oh, if you have a sweet tooth you're in the right place. Cotton candy, ice cream, snow cones, candied and caramel apples (they're different things, I promise)  are everywhere you turn. They'll make you funnel cakes with cherry soda batter or whip up pineapple juice like its frozen yogurt. And they deep fry everything! Oreo cookies, twinkies, cheesecake, even Snickers bars are not safe from the deep fryers and the sticks. And man, are they good. I have to keep eating the proteins like burgers so I don't give myself a diabetic coma from the sweets. The main show center always has a candy seller where you can buy saltwater taffy and other candies by the pound. The last time I went we bought four pounds and only made it home with two...I can't say no to hand squeezed lemonade and limeades. I don't want to.

I will eat my way through the fair this year the same as I do every other year. I'll stay until I've tried everything once, and then I'll grab a caramel apple a second time on my way out to the car. Its so much fun.

Now, I would be remiss to make it sound perfect. Its not. August is the hottest month for us. Tomorrow it will probably be 110 degrees again. It won't be pretty. The trash will smell, the asphalt and the oil from the machines will flat out stink, and there will be people like me there, eating too much and getting sick the minute they hit a ride just a little too hard. Some of the people are rude, or classless or backwoods. It takes all kinds, and all kinds go to the fair. Everywhere I turn I'll see teenagers making out, and I haven't been once that I haven't seen some girl's underwear or lack of on a ride since I was old enough to notice.

The parking's atrocious and I'll pay as much to park as I do to get in. (Or how much a ticket costs, Sakura got us free entry this year.) Again, all the money goes to local charities and youth organizations, so its hard to argue, but its insane all the same. The food will be outrageous. I'll pay dearly for all my favorite snacks. If we don't blow at least a hundred on games, I'll be shocked. But, that's part of the fun. Its why I haven't been in the last few years. Money is scarce and the fair is expensive. It will be crowded and hot, and my clothes, whichever ones I wear, will be ruined. To ride the rides I'll break down and buy an armband for $20 so I don't have to pay per ride. After three rides it will have paid for itself. And I'll ride more than three rides.

There will be irresponsible parents everywhere. Children running unchecked, teenagers being rude. There will be people who cut in line and people who stare at my group of friends. I will be able to wallpaper my bathroom with religious pamphlets and stock my cabinets with vials of emu oil. My feet will hurt, I will stink, because my deodorant will surely not hold up. It will be intense.

But when the fireworks go off at sunset, when my arms are full of useless toys, my neck aches and even my eyes are sunburned, it will be worth it. I'll look at Kitten, Oscelot, Sakura and Flyguy, and I'll be so happy, full and blissed out, I won't care.

The fair, after all, only comes once a year.
I'll be back with a full account.

AGxx

Where The Wind Comes Sweeping Down the Plain

Tomorrow I am taking my two days off of work as a mini vacation. Me, the girls and Kitten's mom are going to drive to Tulsa, Oklahoma for an over-nighter. I'm actually pretty excited about the whole thing, to tell the truth. We don't take a lot of time off in the summer. Its usually the busy season at work, and we have our vacation in November normally. But a day or two out of town is always nice.

Now, I know Tulsa doesn't sound like a very exotic place to go, so why did we choose it? Because we're geeks. One of the museums in Tulsa is showing an exhibit of artifacts that belonged to George Washington. I'm always interested in history of any sort, and much to my shame, I'm shakier on American history than I am on just about any other kind. Ancient history I have down. I know more about the Tudor dynasty than any president the US has ever had. So this excursion will be both interesting and fun for me. I think I'll learn a lot while we're there. And I've never had a road trip with Kitten's mom and she's a pretty interesting lady. It should be a good time.

Kitten has looked up a couple of lady oriented bars in the neighborhood, and there's some good eating nearby. On our second day we're going to take in an art museum, so I think I'll be culturally richer after this little excursion. We are, of course, not doing anything outside. I plan on spending the rest of my free time in the hotel pool, which is indoors. I can hardly imagine it, but its hotter in Oklahoma than it is in Missouri, which is saying something since we hit 100 degrees today. But the forecast for tomorrow says it will be 105 without the heat index, so indoors it is. We may do a bit of walking, but not much, I can tell you, in that heat. I packed light, lots of light skirts and a dress that barely hits my knees, but I still don't want to be outside for too long. I like warm, but I hate hot.

Sakura is going to be sweet and hang out at the house for the next two days to watch our furry kids and make sure they don't have any wild parties or anything. So I've got nothing to worry about on that score. Work, surely, will make it without me. I'm not too worried there.

I plan on picking up something to bring back for Flyguy and Sakura as a surprise. Well, Sakura reads here, so maybe he won't be too stunned, but it will be nice all the same. I was figuring while we were down there that I might run into some sort of interesting art thing, maybe a photography thing Flyguy might like. He's into that sort of stuff. He's planning on coming to see me Wednesday night when we come back. I'm looking forward to it, I haven't seen him as much lately as I would like. And I want him to know he's my favorite fellow.

Speaking of fellows, we've got a new one at work that I quite like. Actually, everyone likes him. He's smart, he's funny, he's hardworking and he talks more than me, so he's easy to get to know. The girls are all sorts of in a fever over him because he's good looking. Frankly, he's not my type, but I like that he reads, and has good taste in movies. He likes to be outdoors and he's both a dog and a cat person. We're planning on having a Christmas in August party soon (rather like our Thanksgiving in February we had) and he's already been invited. The guys at work all have a huge man crush on him. He makes his own beer, works as a welder by day and in general is all things good and manly in their eyes. I get a kick out of it.

Yesterday when he got off there was a whole flock of guys crowded around him after he changed so he could have a beer. It was amusing as hell. Turns out he ended up spending the evening with one of our cooks and his girlfriend as their house, so it looks like he's in all the way around. I'm going to call him Mannie, by the way. So when I chat about him, that's who I'm talking about. I was teasing him today about how he's all the rage at Casa right now. He was laughing about it. He mentioned he might just post his number next to the schedule and see what happens, since I allege at least half the staff has a crush on him. It made me like him even more.

What I think is strange is the similarities between him and Flyguy. If I weren't suspicious that Flyguy is a little jealous of him, I would say they would get along well. But then, maybe he's just jealous because this guy is so similar to him in interest. Or maybe he's as good at spotting the new staff crush as I am. There's never any telling. But when I went to tell him goodbye last Saturday I sat next to him and said I was leaving, but not without telling my favorite fellow goodbye, and he casually glanced behind him at Mannie, who was at the bar getting a drink and said drily "Well, he's right there..." Apparently the store isn't big enough for the two of them...I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, and rather told him that I meant him, of course, he's always going to be my favorite fellow...

Still, if Flyguy can get over his hangups, I'm certain they'd get along. They do share a lot of hobbies, I know because I talk about Flyguy to everyone, including Mannie. Ah, well. I'd chalk it up to feminine rivalry...

Either way, I'll be interested to see how everything plays out. It is what it is, etc, etc...Life, for certain, won't be boring for the next week or so. Especially now that I have another person to chat to and be silly with. I like new friends. I always like new friends, who doesn't? Its likely I will post all the man drama here, because to me, its endlessly amusing. Women are meant to be the ones who are like this, but I've found the men can be just as bad. Indeed, the guys at Casa B are almost all as high maintenance as the women, if not more so.

Give me a day, or two, and I'll be back with lots of photos, history and interesting tidbits for you, I am sure. The next two days are the start of an adventure, if only a mini one.

Find something new and exciting to love. I know I am...
I'm headed west. Where are you headed?
AGxx

Adventure Day

Today was definately an interesting day.

We got up early this morning and headed off to get breakfast. We went to a little diner in our downtown that has really good breakfast food. Used to, we would only go there if we had a lot of time to kill. Truth be told, it takes forever to get your food, and up until recently the service was seriously lackluster. But the food is so darn good! Fortunately there seems to have been a change of management or something because the service has improved beyond measure. It still takes forever to get the food, but it doesn't seem to matter as much since your coffee actually gets refilled. And the coffee is good. They serve gourmet imported stuff. Their hot tea (that's what I really like) is served loose leaf. I've actually had to water down the black tea before- its just that strong.

This morning I got one of their specialty cupcakes. I don't know if I mentioned it the last time I ate there- they have a baker, and her cupcakes are awesome. Last time I had a raspberry cupcake wtih dark chocolate icing and a tiny rasperrby garnish. I actually took a picture of it on my phone, because it looked vaguely like a breast with a very rosy nipple. It was served on a red plate, so it didn't help much. Today I had a summer fruit cupcake, which as best I could tell was strawberry, raspberry and some sort of melon. The icing was cream colored, but I couldn't tell you the flavor. It was delicious. I took a picture of it too.

Afterwards we went to the bus station. As a promotion to get people to use more public transport the local authorities decided today was ride the bus free day. We decided to have an adventure. We rode around town on the bus and stopped off at thrift stores and health food markets and such. It was pretty fun, after I got over the whole 'sit by a stranger who wants to make random conversation with you' thing. I eventually got myself a window seat and put on my sunglasses. Once I had drifted off to daydream land I was alright. The shopping was fun. The girls found some pants they liked. I got three new skirts, a little black dress and a shirt.

Once we made it back downtown we tried a different route. This one was a complete failure. We read the map wrong and ended up taking a tour of the wrong side of town and then coming right back to the bus station. We nicknamed that one "the ghetto bus of doom". There were a few times we were pretty sure the bus driver was just going to have us all pile out into the random fields and shoot us. We were glad to get off.

After, we went to this awesome buger joint near the bus station. They specialize in sliders, which they make (and I mean, put the patty together) as you order them. I might have mentioned them before. I had two bacon cheezeburgers and some chips and a soda. It was delightful. I was so full it hurt.

After that the night was less interesting. I got home, changed for work and headed off. On the upside, work was easy. I'm greatful for that. Tomorrow is my longest day of the week, so I am always glad when Thursdays aren't quite as painful.

Have you had an adventure this week?

AGxx