Contemplating the Idea of Friendship

My plants finally came in the mail, and I got to plant two rose bushes and 40 hedges yesterday. Turns out we way under-ordered on the hedges. It only partially covered the side of the house, so we'll eventually have to oder more, assuming I don't kill the first round. I'm pretty excited. I broke in my callouses yesterday.

I also heard back that my friend at workt hat I helped with the paper not only got an A, but she graduated as well. It turned out that paper was all that stood between her and her bachelor's degree. I was pretty happy.

I've gotten more written on my novel this week. I was reading a post from Perpet the other day on her blog (not the one I linked to, but her writing blog) and I felt really inspired. As far as publishing goes, Perpet has been way more successful than I have. She's getting her work out there and I'm really proud of her. Sometimes though, I have to admit, I feel a little jealous. I also feel like I am a complete loser when it comes to my writing. But this post of hers, it really lifted my spirits and gave me a lot of perspective. I felt better about myself when I finished reading it.

the Lifeguard is back in town for a few days. Technically she went home for the summer last weekend, but because she plays roller derby for our local team she got to come back down for practice and a bout this week. She came over last night and I got to spend a little time with her. It was really nice. It also got me to thinking.

Of all the people in my life that I care for, most of them were not an active part of my life 4 years ago. Now, I was best friends with Perpet, she's been there since the beginning. Saukura has been there as well, although I regret not spending more time with him over the last 8 years or so. I feel like I missed a lot of opportunity to spend time with him, and one day soon one or the both of us will move far away from the miserable little midwestern town we live in.

Other than that, there aren't a lot of people in my life I've known for a long time. I mean, there's acquaintances and ex-es and all that, but not really people I love and trust. Now, on the one hand I would say that makes me pretty fickle, that I change friends so often. On the other hand, I'd say that my life has been through so many radical changes that it was necessary for me to change most of the people in my life. I think its making me stronger.

Earlier this week I was at work and when I got out to my section there was a guy at a new tableof mine, and honestly, he was someone I had hoped I would never see again. If you're familiar with my old blog, you would remember my ex Preacher Man, and some of the awful things he did to me. When I was still seeing him and those bad things happened to me, this particular guy that was in my section was a friend of ours. He knew what wsa happening to me, and I asked him for help. I was frightened. When he told me no, that he wouldn't rat out his buddies, I was devastated. I don't think I ever took the time to forgive him for letting me hurt like that.

I don't think he recognized me, he didn't seem to. He and his mom were completely polite, they were completely easy to care for, but the whole time I was waiting on them I was remembering all those things that happened to me, all those hurts, and I was torn between crying and bringing my tray down over his head. Instead, I texted Saukura and asked him to say a prayer for me and to send me love. I felt better, knowing there was someone out there that cared enough for me to take a moment out of their day and talk to god on my behalf. It got me through that terrible hour. It was great to have a friend who could be my strength for me when I needed it.

Fortunately, I seem to have a lot of those right now. I have beautiful, wonderful friends who love me enough to want to support me when I am feeling overwhelmed or trapped or frightened. I've never experienced that before. Even when I was with Beloved, I didn't really have friends. Now I can honestly say I do. Last week when The Lifeguard came to get me after dinner with the girls so I could have some time away, it meant more to me than I could have ever expressed to her. Not only was she taking time out of her very busy schedule to come see me, but she was giving me a shoulder to cry on and an ear that was willing to listen. She let me be myself, and she didn't judge when I told her that my partners (who are her friends too) were making me absolutely bananas. I felt more relaxed, more rested and more free after that couple of hours than I had in months. I realized I could take time for myself, have a life with my friends as well as with my partners.

Now I think about whether or not I am a good enough friend. I don't say this to solicit comments from my friends who read this blog, but as an honest moment of reflection. I want to think I would do whatever it took to make my friends happy, secure and well. I think I would do what they do for me, when they need it. I love my friends more than I could ever say, especially now that I am learnign to appreciate the very important role they have in my life.

I can only hope that they look at me the same way I do them. I sincerely hope they can't make it without me. I don't knwo what I would do if I didn't have them there.

I Love You Friends. (I love you too, readers)
AGxx

Reflections on Life in Restaurants: a bitch about the job post.

This last week at work has been interesting for me. Part of it is the come-down from what is undoubtably the busiest week of the year for us. Our two busiest days of the year fall within about 4 days of each other every year, and it has a tendency to wear you down. Also, as one of our senior servers, I get to work these days all day long, and that means I make a lot of money. Unfortunately, there's always about ten places to put each dollar, and while it should help, it feels like I am right back in the spot I was before.

The other downside to working those busy days is that the week following seems so slow it hurts. Yes, of course, it is not going to be so busy we have a line out the door, because that doesn't happen very often anyway. The other thing is everyone seems to have gottent heir fill of Mexican food the week prior, so business is even slower.

I've noticed that when its slow you tend to notice things you might not, or things that would normally not bother you begin to grate a lot more quickly than normal. It seems like on the slow days the bad customers are worse than normal, the kids are louder when they acream and the nice tables are fewer and farther in between.

Yesterday was a good example of that. I seemed to have about a 50/50 ratio of really nice people versus people who made me want to throw things at them. Never good. Since I've been making an effort to improve my karma, when I get to work I tell myself that I should only be sending goodness and love out into the world. God will reward me for that. That's what I tell myself. Take care of others, god will take care of you. The problem is I believe, always, that being kind does not necissarily mean being a doormat. I honestly struggled to maintain not just a detachedly polite facade, but one that was plesant and kind. When someone is being rude to you, its a real test.

There are some things as a waitress that just really get on my nerves. My biggest problem is that most customers are totally unaware of their surroundings. On a day when we aren't so busy there's a line out the door, most guests assume that if I am not standing over their table then I must be in the back on my cell phone or in the break room smoking. This is almost never true. If you pay attention to where your server is in a restaurant, you could see this. Most of the time I have two or three other tables at least. In a half hour period, this means I am not only taking care of you (keeping your drinks and chips full, making conversation, taking orders, making deserts and carrying out your food) I am also trying to time it right so that I can do that for a minimum of two or three other sets of people at the same time. That's no easy task.

Yesterday we had a waitress on the other side of the store taking care of a big group. When their food came up in the window I helped her carry it out. By the time I got back to my tables, one of them was angry because their sodas were half full. I didn't feel like I deserved that anger. One, they still had half a soda, two, I was there to check on them for that purpose, to make sure they didn't need anything. It was a struggle for me to not be rude when they got onto me.

Another problem with working in a restaurant like the one I work in is that you have a constant flow of refills. Not just sodas. In a normal restaurant if you don't order appetizers you waitress will probably only stop by once to make sure your sodas or tea is still full. In one like mine, where we serve chips and sala at the table for free (or say, an Italian restaurant that serves bread) people expect you to be there the minute they run out, or even come close. I don't mind keeping the chips and salsa full, that's my job. What I do mind is how much people eat, or demand, when they know its free.

For example, I had a table the other day that had three people at it. They wanted me to bring out enough chips and salsa for 12 people. I wouldn't do it. It goes to waste, and I get in trouble. Most of my customers eat far more than they should. Figure this: a jar of salsa at the store is about a pint. Two of our dishes equals a pint. My average table of 4 will go through a minimum of 6 dishes of salsa. How many of us sit at home and will eat three jars of salsa in the space of less than 15 minutes? Even if you have friends over? Even if you have dinner being made? I think its gross. I can't help it. The same thing goes for people who drink seven or eight sodas in one meal. That's like 4 two-liter bottles. Ew.

Now, there are things that are just plain rude, and I think that they ought to be pointed out; not because my lovely bloggers would ever do anything like this, but because I have to get it off my chest.

When your glass is empty, you don't shake it at the waitress. I told a man one time (not at this job) that to me, that meant he wanted me to take his glass away and not bring him a new one. If you want more chips or salsa and you pick up your dish and wave it at me, I'm going to take it from you. Don't tell me you wanted to keep that one until I brought the new one, if you throw it up in my face, I assume you don't want it anymore.

When I get to the table to greet you, at least wait until I say my name and ask how you are to start sking for things. There is nothing I dislike more than to be at a table, trying to be pleasant, and then to be interrupted mid-sentence with "Water with two lemons, and we need more chips. A lot more chips." Seriously? Its rude.

Here's the big one for me lately: if you have a coupon, say $5 off your meal, tip at least the amount of the discount if your service was acceptable. Waitresses hate coupons laying on the table, because normally it means we aren't going to be tipped.

Oh, and on tipping. I don't know who spread this rumor, but outside of maybe two states in the entire US waitresses don't make minimum wage. For example, I make $3.25 an hour. Not even half of minimum wage. I do actually need you to tip me. I woldn't be nearly as plesant when your screaming child throws Jello at me if I wasn't dependent on you for my wage. In my world, in most restaurants, if the service is adequate leave 15%. If the service was good, leave 20% If the service was stellar, leave more. When you do that and come back, your waitress will remember you and will take good care of you every time. She is also more likely to tell you about specials, or hook you up with discounts or free stuff. If you take care of your waitress, she will take care of you. Under only the most EXTREME cicumstances do you not leave a tip. If it is so bad you will never eat in that restaurant again, then consider it. Otherwise, leave at least the $3 or whatever to make the girl up to minimum wage. Its a bad tip, and she knows it, but you aren't putting her in a hardship. Tell her, in fact, to her face (POLITELY) if she asks if things could have been better, or how she was doing, how to make things better. Or talk to her manager, and tell them, (POLITELY) how this server could be guided to improve so you will enjoy your experience more.

Also, remember this, waitresses are people too. We have feelings. You can hurt them. If you're having a bad day and you take it out on us, we will be offended or hurt. Remember that a lot of us are going through college, or are trying to get into college, or get back in. We have families to support and lives outside of work. I might be stressed because of Kitten's finals. Maybe my cat died, or my mom doesn't have somewhere to live and she wants me to support her. Maybe my best friend just moved away and I don't have an emotional support system like I used to. Maybe your special order made my cooks mad and I got yelled at for it, even though it wasn't my fault.

There are a lot of things going on in my head during a workday, and most of them don't have to do with your Pepsi refill or whether your burrito took 5 minutes to make or 10. I can't tell you the amount of times, even in the last month, that I or one of my staff was reduced to tears because one of our customers was cruel to us. We have a fabulous girl at work who just became a mother for the second time. She actually had a table yell at her and upset her. What they didn't know was she was busy dealing with our terrible insurance to take care of her doctor bills, and that even though she made the effort to look beautiful like she always does, she came to work with less than 2 hours of sleep because the baby was up all night. Why did she deserve to be yelled at? She didn't. You know what the woman was mad about? She had arrived to her table after the rest of the party and she didn't have her own salsa dish. She had to wait maybe 5 minutes for one rather than share. See, to me, I don't see how that should bring on a screaming tirade in front of a dining room full of people, solely for the intent of humiliating that poor girl. Its not her fault.

I change clothes every day at work. (Why do I make this point you wonder? I'll tell you) I spend six days a week in my restaurant. I live in my work uniform. Thing is, I don't think most of my guests ever think of me outside of my blue or red polo and black pants. Yesterday I changed into a pair of high heels, capris and a brown and pink chiffon dress over it before I lef.t I took down my hair, and put on some lip gloss. When I was leaving to go get Kitten, two of our regular (but not MY regular) customers were coming in. You should have seen their faces. They actually stopped the hostess so they could make me turn around and let them look at me. They were astounded. You see, as nice as they are, I don't think it ever occured to them that I might not always wear my uniform. They never thought that maybe outside of work I could be a pretty girl, or wear dresses and high heels. They never think to see me that way. The funny thing is, not five minutes before that I was talking to one of my co-workers after I changed clothes. She asked why I always do. I told ehr its because when I am not on the clock, I feel more human in my dresses and heels. I feel like a real person who has more in their life than their apron and slip-proof sneakers. I think these people proved my point.

I love my job most days. I have overcome my natural shyness and I like working with people. I like most of my coworkers. I love my regular customers. In fact, a couple of them follow this blog. It means a lot to me. They take good care of me, they care about my life, they are involved in me more than just whether or not I can serve their tacos. That makes a difference to me. I'd say that these people get better service from me 90% of the time. They deserve it. The nice thing is, if I am getting my ass kicked, they see it, because they know me, and I don't get punished like other servers might, because they know if I had the choice, I'd be at their table asking about their kids and their businesses and their latest projects. These are the customers in my store that we fight over. I even have a few regulars whom I love, but who will sit with anyone, becaue they get great service no matter who they get. When they come in, the other servers will come to me, and some of the other crew members, and tell them they are in so that we can stop by and say hello. That's a good customer.

I digress. Most days i like my job. I like my boss. I like my coworkers. Most of the time, I like my customers. Its the few bad apples that can really spoil a day. I always tell my new kids two things: first is that you can't let one table spoil your whole day. If you do, then your next regular may be at the next table, and you might blow it because you're still upset about the last one. You won't make any money that way. You can't. You have to let it go, however hard it might be. The other thing I tell them is to not get mad or upset. Not on the clock. Unless things go really wrong, they're going to get some money from a table. It might not be what they deserve, or what they would like, but its something. Its more than they had before. I tell them to cry, or cuss, or scream; but to do it after work on the way to the bank. In the end, if you got the moeny, that's all that counts.

Teh sad thing is, that's advice that's really hard to take. Especially this last week. We'll see how I do this time.

Sprry to bitch about Casa Bueno, I don't do it often, but it seems to be weighing on me this week, and getting it off my chest here is better than getting it off my chest other places.

Love you all. I'll try to post something amusing tomorrow. If anyone has an idea, let me know. I'm all tapped out for dry humor, it seems.

Lots of love,
AGxx

The Craft, Zoos and Other Things Keeping Me Busy

My lovely Friends: Black Magic, The Lifeguard, Kitten, Oscelot, The Real Deal, and Auto.



Me and my ladies having fun outside the tiger enclosure.

I've been a bad blogger. Sorry Idisappeared. This last couple of weeks has been busy at work, and I've actually gotten to do some stuff with my friends inthe off time, which means very little work on my novel and even less time to blog.

So this last week I did two or three fun things. The first is I went and got a notebook to use as my book of shadows. Its great. I've actually been taking tiem to learn about my Craft, and I love it. Saukura has been coming over in the evenings when he is free, and the four of us have been sitting and talking about our goals, what we want from life and our practice. I've been learning and it feels really good. I liked having other practitioners to talk with, because up until now I've been what is generally called a solitary practitioner. The prospect of having someone to celbrate holidays with and work with is exciting. I feel like there are all sorts of possibilites opening up before me. I almost get now why Christians would want to go to church, although I have to admit church has never been anything particularly filling for me.

My other big outing this week was to our local zoo. It's not huge, because it is privately funded. Still, it's pretty big. We went with a gourp of friends on Tuesday, which is our day off. This week, we got together in the morning with Black Magic and Lifeguard (another friend of ours you'll probably hear a lot about) and had breakfast. It was nice, because Kitten makes the best breakfasts on the planet. eriously, she's theonly person I've ever met who won't scre wup my bacon, my eggs, or my hashbrowns. If it hadn't already been love, it would have been the first time she made me breakfast.

Afterwards we met two of Oscelot and I's co-workers at the zoo. They are without a doubt one of the cutest couples that I have ever met. Real Deal, the girl, is a server with us, and her and Oscelot get along really well. Auto, her boyfriend, has worked with me since I started at Casa Bueno, and is my very favorite cook. So the six of us went off to explore our lovely zoo and take lots of pictures.

We had a really nice time. I got a kick out of playing in the petting zoo, we fed the fish enough food to waste probably $8 in quarters, but it was fun. We kept trying to get the food to the turtles, who seemed either too slow or too stupid to get to the food before the fish did.

I got time to play on the playground with Lifeguard, which was great, because I like having someone else around willing to go down the slides, climb the monkey bars and all those other fun things. It makes me feel less like an old person and more like I've got plenty of life left in me.

We were a little disappointed. The giraffe feeding deck was closed by the time we got to it, and we were really wanting to do that. The otters, who are normally out and showing off, were not in their yard. That kinda sucked too. I love the otters. Otherwise, we had a great time. The bears were playing together under the trees, and it was completely adorable. I played hide and seek with the warthog, which ws hilarious, because every time I disappeared around the corner he would start grunting really, really loudly.

The Lions acutally decided to get up (they are almost always sleeping) and we got a bit of a show from them. The male started calling to the female and his voice was beautiful. She came out of their little cave and gave him kisses, and then went back inside. He thought this was great, and I got an awesome picture of him on his back, looking more like one of my cats (albeit huge) and a lot less like an animal that could tear your throat out.

The sun was out and we got plenty of it. It was almost ninety degrees at the hottest point in the day. That's not normal for May in this area of the country, but we weren't complaining. I wore sunscreen, of course, and actually got enough sun that once of my coworkers commented on it the day after. I was sorry that the many interactive water features at the zoo werent running yet, but again, its just now the middle of May. We were having July weather. (until yesterday, when we had a frost. A frost!)

I will admit, the walking was a little rough on my ankle, which is still pretty sore. It isn't swollen twice its size anymore, but I'm still bracing it for work, and when I get home I have to elevate and ice it.

In other news, I had an eye appointment last week which precipitated a meltdown on my part. Turns out the insurance from Casa Bueno has gotten messed up, with respects to me, so I had taken out my last pair of contacts and was waiting to get my eyes checked when the blurry figure of the nurse came to tell me my insurance had been canceled. I wasn't pleased. At all. I'm still working out how to fix that, and in the meantime I rescheduled my appointment and the eye doctor graciously lent me a pair of contacts in my old prescription so I wouldn't have to be blind. Which is good, because I am legally blind without my contacts and glasses. I ended up upset enough the girls took me to dinner. They very graciously allowed me to call Lifeguard, and she and I went for a drive hat evening. It was really nice. We had gelato and made a mess of ourselves. That was fun. I was glad to do it, because she had to go back to her hometown for the summer on Friday.

Tonight is one of our coven nights, although we usually just play games on Sunday and bond. I'm looknig forward to it.

Also, I have to mention, God and Godess bless the people who came in to my section earlier this week. I was talking to them about pets and they found out about all the stray cats we feed. One of them has family that runs a pet shelter, and they have acess to more pet food than they will ever need. They offered to let me take flats (whole truckoads!) of food from them at no charge to feed my starving outdoor kids. They only live a couple neighborhoods away form me. I was crying at the table. It is such a relief. We spend almost as much a month on cat food as we do on human food. I was so greatful.

That's me in a nutshell for the past two weeks.

I'm pretty boring, huh?

AGxx

Update

I and my blog are not dead. This is the busiet week of the year at Casa Bueno. I am beginning to loathe Cinco De Mayo.

I also helped a friend write a research paper this last two weeks on international accounting standards.

I fell off my front porch this morning and I'm pretty sure I hurt my ankle pretty bad, no breaks, but I think, judging by the swelling and bruising, I've strained somethign at the very least.

So: grumpy, tired, geeked-out, and in pain. That sums it up.

I swear, I'll write something of value in the next few days.

Also, Happy mother's day to all the moms out there.

Keep safe and well,
agxx

Jane Austen, Vampires and Genre Writing

This is the lovely Anita Blake. If you haven't met her, you should.

It's been a rainy week or so in my area of the US. I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to start collecting the animals two by two if things don't let up soon. The rain has really curbed my outdoor activities, since thunderstorms and tornadoes aren't really what you'd call conducive to gardening and yard work. As a result, I've found myself reading a lot more and keeping one eye on the television when the girls are watching movies (yes, I can do both at the same time.)

I had a couple of thoughts on books this week. The first thing I was thinking about was Jane Austen. Part of that stems from me having watched and read Jane Austen Book Club reently. Botht hte bookand the movie are nice and light, so check them out if you like Jane Austen. The book is by Karen Joy Fowler.

Anywy, I'm a big Austen fan. I have multiple copies of Pride and Prejudice, and all of her other books except Northanger Abbey, which I have yet to read. I also have the BBC version of P&P on Dvd, you know, the one with Colin Firth in it. Its one of my rainy day go-tos when I'm feeling a little low.

I don't know how many Austen fans I've got out there, so I'll pose this question to you: If you do read her, love her, what3ever, do you like the storylines for what they are or do you truly identify with the characters?

That's the one thing that bothered me about JABC the book and the movie. This idea that somehow there is this Jane Austen character lurking in all of us. I don't know that I agree.

I don't think all pretty girls are waiting to make great monied love matches. I don't think that they settle for slightly less handsome but stable and proper men after being jilted by a good-looking rake. I would like to think most mothers (not mine, maybe, but most) are sensible and want to look out for their children and not push them into wedlock. I want to think that not all boorish men are bad-looking and that not all intellectual men have to be ugly or churchish.

I like the stories because they are situation comedy from I time period I love, and they are well written. I like them because I find the characters amusing and engaging. But I don't, and have never, likened myself to one of the characters.

Something to think about.

I was also thinking about vampire books this week. Say what you will, they are my guilty pleasure. I love them. I can talk classics with the best of them, but nothing pelases me more than finding someone else who hates Richard from the Anita Blake series or someone who wishes Sookie Stackhouse would stop crying and man up already.

I got to thinking about the vampire genre because in about a week the new Sookie Stackhouse book "Dead Reckoning" is being released (May 3, for those who are counting down) and in June of this year the newest Anita Blake novel "Hit List" is going to be released. These books are 11 and 20 in their series' respectively. Those are big milestones for series writers. Its a lot of books. In my opion of both these authors, its also a lot of well written books.

Now, say what you want about vampire books ingeneral, or these two series inparticular; Charlaine Harris and Laurell K. Hamilton are excellent writers. I'm not saying that the books are highbrow, or modern classics. they aren't. But they are really good for their genre, and both of them have defied traditional ideas within their genre, and branched out. Both these authors do their research, both of them write will becautiful imagery. Their characters feel human. It's part of why I am so addicted to them.

Now, I know, a lot of people would say that vampire books are actually a sub-genre for fantasy or for horror. I disagree. If I were organizing my local Barnes and Noble, or had I (dare to dream) my own bookstore, I would be shelving all of the vampire books in one section under the heading "VAMPIRE."

Vampires have moved beyond sub-genre. You can't catagorize them. There are vampire mysteries, vampire romances, vampire fantasies, there are modern vampire novels and historic vampire novels. I even saw a vampire biography a few months back. There is cross-genre within the vampire genre. There are YA vampire books and adults only vampire books. There are crossover series. I don't think you can stick vampires next to faeries (sic) or demons or princesses encased in magical jewels or dragons anymore. I think they get their own heading, and I think the authors that have worked hard to make this genre what it is deserve the credit.

I think you start with Anne Rice and thank her for making vampires sexy and modern, then you thank Laurell K Hamilton, who started plugging away at the Anita Blake series in the eighties for making vampires even sexier than before, and Charlaine Harris who made a vampire series so popular HBO picked it up and ran with the idea. And yes, I do think my hating friends, you thank Stephanie Meyer for making the Young Adult and Crossover a legitimate part of the vampire genre. I had never heard of the Nightworld Series, or The Vampire Diaries, or any of those other great(ish) YA books until I was trolling through the YA section to get Stephanie Meyer merchandies. She gets credit for that. I also think you give a nod to Elizabeth Kostova for reminding us that vampires can still scare the bejezus out of you, when done properly.

There are so many authors out there that are contributing to the vampire genre, and I think there ought to be a separate section in the bookstore just for them. You could fill aisles with vampire books. I'd wager you could probably get a whole store if you tried (maybe the next branch off for Powells City of Books in Portland?).

I have an enormous respect for authors who take an age-old concept and make it new, fresh and riveting. I love that Charliane Harris is using the concept of modern technology to make me wonder whether or not in a few years I might actually meet a real vampire. I think it kicks ass that every time I am in Branson, MO I go down a specific road I get the heebie-jeebies because I know that there's a master vampire lair there because Laurell K Hamilton took the time to find that spot somehow in her research. I love that in any one of her given books I can see where exactly in St. Louis Anita is, because she knows that on the corner of this street there's a Union Planter's Bank and a Burger King, and she puts it in. They are taking the old mythology and making it new again. They are creating completely new universes set in our universe. I think that's a talent every writer should envy.

In light of the upcoming book releases, I'm probably going to go reread the last few in those serieses, because I like to remember what's going on.

Have a creepy, awesome night.
AGxx

I also need to disclaim that I do not own Jane Austen, Charlaine Harris, Elizabeth Kostova, Karen Joy Fowler, Laurell K Hamilton, Stephanie Meyer nor any of their characters or books,nor any other book I might have mentioned in this post, as much as I might like to. I also got the lovely image at the top of the page from wikia.com, which has a wonderful index of all things Anita Blake, check them out. Oh, and I'm pretty sure that image is from one of the Marvel Comics of Anita Blake. I don't own Marvel either.

Kitteh Commiteh

If you've clicked on the LOL Cats link in my sidebar you've seen one of these guys before.

I've been meaning to do an odd post about the cat thing, ebcause, I'm sure you've noticed, I've got a few, and I tend to use cat names as reference points for some of the people in my life. There's a reason for this. I'm obsessed. Only kidding.

When I was a little girl I was allergic to cats. I don't know if it was my asthma, or a paranoia on my parent's part or what, but I didn't get my first pet cat until I was about eight years old. Now, my grandmother had a couple of cats and they never seemed to bother me, so it might just be that my mom didn't think I needed a pet. I have no idea. (My grandma;s cats, by the way, were Juliet whome we called Juliegg because my brother had a speech impediment; and Fluffy, who had the most ironic name on the planet, because she died when she crawled into the dryer when my grandma wasn't looking.)

So I got my first cat when I was eight. His name was Frisky and he had a grey tip on his tail, otherwise he was white all over. I loved him. Several cats followed after that, and I don't need to tell you about them. The point is, since that time, I have almost always had a pet cat. The exception to this was when I was with BBD, who hates cats. (I should have known then there was something wrong with him.)

When I moved in with Kitten she had two adorable cats: Samson and Delyla. They were both rescues. Two summers ago, when I was a DJ at a local club Samason snuck out as I snuck in at whatever godawful hour of the morning I got off.I was heartbroken. Delyla never really liked me. In fact, for the first six months I lived with Kitten she peed on everything that had my scent on it. We went through so many pillows that we almost decided to take her to the vet to see what was wrong with her. Turns out once she realized I wasn't going anywhere, she knocked it off. She's still Kitten's cat, through and through. She actually acts more like a dog. She is the princess of the house, I think it is a result of her being a totally manky stray cat.

Actually, all of our cats seem to carry their dominant manky trait into some sort of weird neurosis now.

Voodoo, my little black cat, was a dumpster cat. Literally. She showed up on our porch about two years ago and she was all tiny and pathetic and we wouldn't let her in for fear of Delyla freaking out so she slept on our recycling dumpster. She looked lonely and sad all the time. We finally let her in during a terrible october rainstorm. She was squalling on the porch and we could hear her above the thunder. I went to the door to look at her, and when she saw Kitten behind me she lifted her paw and sneezed very theatrically. In she came. She went through (I am so not joking) nearly a solid year of being in heat before she calmed down enough for us to get her into the vet. She literally would go right back into heat the moment we picked up the phone to make an appointment. Now she mopes a lot, wants to be groomed, and spends her time wanting cuddles. But not too many.

We decided we didn't need more than two cats.

Then Dad called because a stray kitten had shown up on his porch. Would we take it? No, we said. We don't need another cat. Would we at least try to find her a home? Sure, we could do that. Dad had two big dogs at the time. No house for a kitten. We carried her home, bathed her (she had SO MANY FLEAS)and combed her. Then we realized she was deformed in her back leg. And she walked on her knuckles. This little cat, whom we had resolved to call Kitty so we wouldn't get attached, whispered in Kitten's ear that her name was Purrsephanie (I swear, that's what Kitten said) and we realized we wouldn't give her up to someone we couldn't be sure would take care of her when her leg got really bad. Purrsephanie (Squirt, we call her) is a habitual bather. Not just herself, but any of our other cats, or us, if she sees fit.

Three.

Oscelot moved in, and by that time we had been feeding the strays that used to live at our neighbors and now lived on our porch for some time. Her favorite stray, Precious (not our name) got pregnant and lost all of her kittens. So we thought. Then one day Kitten was on the front porch and Precious came up to her with a little black kitten in her mouth. She was clearly not feeding it, it needed help. We brought it in, fed it, wiped it's bottom and put it back out. Only Oscelot kept sneaking it in. Then Kitten stopped fighting her when she wanted to let it play inside. Then she stopped fighting her when she wanted to keep it for good. It's our only boy. His name is Munkostrap. We call him bubba or little man most of the time, because Munkostrap is a mouthful, and he really doesn't know the difference. All Bubba wants is to be held. I would chalk that up to either being held too much as a baby, or, if you want to give him feelings, he knows that his mother didn't take care of him, and now he wants to be babied.

Now, at this point we had four cats, which we all agreed was probably too many. We keep the litter scooped (constantly, I swear, they poop for fun!) and we vaccuum all the time, and we mop all the itme, and really, if you didn't see them, most our friends swear you wouldn't know we have pets.

So one night Kitten was on Craigslist, the bane of all who wish to remain sane and junk-free, and she saw a woman post how she was getting her apartment floors redone and she couldn't afford to kennel her kitten for the week. Would someone watch her for free. I get the text from Kitten that we are going to pick up a baby cat and sit it for a week.

I'm sure you aren't suprised, we got stuck with her. The mom wouldn't take her back. She was so tiny. I got attached. She's a littlee grey ball of fluff, with tiny white mittens and bloomers, and she is so cute. Also, tiny. She still had her milk teeth when we got her. Her name is Evelyn, and I'm glad we kept her. She was so sick the first month we had her, we honestly worried about her health. Now she is fat and happy, and like Bubba, needs to be cuddlesd constantly. In fact, most of the spelling errors on this blog are a result of her being in my lap, and me being unwilling to retype when she jumps in my way. She is also a neurotic nurser. She actually has a blanket she is allowed to nurse on, in our attempt to keep her from nursing everything and evryone else. It seems to be working.

Now, this might only qualify us for being cat ladies, not a Kitteh Commiteh, if it weren't for the fact that we have a cat fixation in our personalities. I started calling Kitten my tiger affectionately, and somehow, it stuck, and our friends refer to her as a tiger as well.

Soemhow along the line, our friends assigned me the title Panther, although the only explanation I can come up for this is that I wear a lot of black. I'm still working that out. Kitten says its because I'm sleek. I don't see how since my hair is more like a guinea pig's than anything else.

So one night we were joking iwth our friend Bobcat about being a cougar, but since she's a lesbian there has to be a different term for it. That's how she got the name bobcat. Also, it seems to suit her.

When we continued to hang out, we began a Kitteh Committeh joke, because we all read the LOL Cats page for fun.

Then she introduced us to Oscelot, who got her name from her love of water, and because she's adorable and tiny, just like an Oscelot should be.

The commiteh expanded.

Then we extended membership to our dear friend Earth Girl, who married Kitten and I, and decided to call her the Lion. (Lioness, I suppose, but who's keeping track?) I thought this was absolutely appropriate because when I met her she had beautiful golden hair that trailed down to her waist. She gave it to Locks of Love, which I think is admirable. I still see her with long hair, even if it is short now.

When Oscelot's birthday came around, we were introduced to Black Magic, who became part of our Sunday game night and we christened her Cheetah, although this is another one that goes to personality, seeing as how she can't walk very well right now.

Bobcat is getting married, her partner is call Teh Lynx. So we have ourselves quite a substantial group of people described by their cat personalities.

That my friends, is the story of the Kitteh Committeh.

I could talk about my cats all day, and my friends longer, but thatm ight bore you.

Now you know, when the Committeh has a meeting, what exactly I'm talking about.

Kitteh love to you all,
AGxx

Did You Ever Sweat to the Oldies?

I have to confess, we actually own a Richard Simmons exercise tape. Now, it is technically a leftover from when Guitar Hero lived with us, and its not a 'Sweatin'' video. It's some sort of Latin Dance exercise video. We did it once and we laughed all the way through it. Somehow, I can't seem to focus on exercise when I look at Richard Simmons. Maybe its because he seems so funny to me. I'm sure that he's a totally approachable guy for people who are not the skinny types you see on most exercise videos. That has to help, I am sure. But the impulse to giggle, while great for the abs, is not really a foolproof exercise tool.

So last week we were hanging around the house one evening and I was talking to Oscelot about ballet. She went to an arts conservatory, but she got kicked out of her ballet class because she doesn't have the right body type. As a consequence, she knows almost nothing about the mechanics of ballet. Appreciate it, yes she does; but I don't think she would be able to tell you much about the preformance aspect of it.

Anyway, she had mentioned that she wished she could have seen me when I was a dancer. I, of course, thought she meant that brief ill-advised period in my late teen years when I was a preformer in a local bar in town. She laughed and said, no, she meant when I was a ballet dancer. I pointed out to her there wasn't much to watch, really. I was okay, but as for someone rivieting, probably not. I have bad feet, you see.

Then I got to explain the concept of bad feet to her, the idea that no matter how flexible you are you will never have perfect turnout. Your body isn't built for it. I have this sad condition, an affliction to me as a young dancer, because I truly loved it (and, as anyone who is familiar with ballet will tell you, you can't have a career as a dancer is you have poor turnout).

I stood up to demonstrate to her my bad feet. Now, I'm not nearly as flexible now as I once was, so my turnout is damn poor now. She showed me hers, and Anna showed me hers. No suprise, if they were both to improve their flexibility, they would have perfect turnout.

Point is, we got to playing around with the steps and then I realized I wanted to feel all stretchy and healthy. So I went hunting for my Yoga DVD and put it in. I begged their indulgence. They not only didn't mind, they did the DVD with me. It was wonderful.

My former partners have never been fond of my Yoda DVD because (they say) the lady who does it has an annoying voice, and I look positively stupid while I'm doing it. Imagine my chock when my lovely Kitten and Oscelot joined me in the floor to stretch and relax.

You know what kills me? Of the three of us, I am the least flexible. I'm the only one who had to use modifications for the standing positions. I don't have any blocks, so I used a couple of the Harry Potter books, and I was leaned to one side, struggling to get a good stretch that didn't kill me and I almost fell over when I looked at the girls. There they were, hips forward, hands on the floor, arms outstretched, looking absoutely perfect, if not comfortable. I suppose it gives me soemthing to work for. When I was sixteen I was so flexible I could put my feet in front of me and and lay my head on the floor next to my kneecaps. Now I can barely touch my toes without pulling something.

The evening was relaxing, and we were inspired. Oscelot and I stopped off to get a couple of workout DVD's after work the next day so that we could try and do a little at home work to feel better. I don't think I need to lose weight, Kitten is so skinny she needs a sandwich, and I think all Oscelot wants is to tone. But the idea of having two partners that are willing to work with me at home, knowing at least one of us is going to look really stupid at some point, is so novel to me.

Neither of them seem to mind, in fact, I think they are both rather eager. It's a nice change. Really it is. I keep thinking, once summer rolls around we get to be active and be outdoors. Now, even though we are covered with a constant rain cloud (seriously, its been raining for almost a week solid here, and the forecast say we get at least another three days of this before it stops) I can still be active and find a way to bond with my girls. It is so nice.

No, I porbably won't get out the Richard Simmons dvd, I think the moemory of us doing it would be nough to cause me to lose focus. But the new ones, I can't wait to pull them out of their wrappers and give them a try.

I'm off to go do some Yoga before I wake Oscelot up for work. I want to see if this whole "do it in the mrning and you'll feel relaxed all day" theory holds true.

Happy shaping up.
AGxx

PS- I obviously don't own or know Richard Simmons, who I am sure is a lovely person and has great workout videos.